OK, being on-call sucks on the whole. I have to stick around the house, I can't spend time Mr. Beau, I am forced to actually do some housework since there is little else to do. However, in an act of rebellion against that last bit I decided to spend time watching movies (ok, so I am folding clothes at the same time). One of the movies I decided to watch is For The Bible Tells Me So. Below are two of the trailers for the film (thanks YouTube):
I have to say, to the most ardent of literalists this film will not change your mind about your interpretation of the Bible (and I found a few logical fallacies when they tried to confront literalism), but my hope is that this film will in some small part help change how religious families view their child if he or she comes out to them. Given that gay youths are 3-to-7 times more likely to commit suicide as their straight counterparts any little bit helps. I was particularly proud of that old Missouri congressman Richard Gephardt and his wife when talking about their lesbian daughter. After being told by Chrissy that she was gay Mr. Gephardt, in the best portrayal of family values in the film, said that his first worries about all this was for his daughter, for her safety and fear for her (not him and his wife) of the discrimination that he knew was out there. Now the movie is NOT anti-Christian or anti-religion, but it does show some scenes that are disturbing (like the well know clip of Jimmy Swaggart saying that if any man looked at him "that way" he would kill him and just tell God that the man died), but these five family all have at their core a strong vein of religious belief and faith and they did have struggles. One daughter, after not speaking with her mother for several months after coming out, committed suicide. I can't think of anything more difficult for a mother or father to take. My own parents have had a difficult journey over the years and at various times in the film I could see their faces and even hear their words coming from the mouthes of others. But like most of the parents in the film they concluded that there will just have to be some things that will be resolved between God and me, and as for the rest I am their son and nothing will ever change that. If only others could be that fortunate.
2 comments:
My favorite brother is probably gay. He was an alterboy long after the age when boys quit being alterboys. His best friend from grade school became a priest and Paul was with him when he died of AIDS. Paul also has a 'special friend', but also had long term relationships with women that never went anywhere. He is unmarried and 49-50 yo. If he is gay, he has never 'come out' as you have, perhaps because Catholicism does not endorse homosexuality or because of the social stigma. My sister, who is the closest to my mother, tends to run him down because of his projected homosexuality.
I admire your openness in dealing with your family; it takes considerable courage. Personally, I think the world would be a much poorer place without gays or lesbians as they have made a disproportionate contribution to the arts and sciences.
Thank you for your kind words. It's difficult to come out even in this day and age. I grew up in a very rural area in the Midwest with very conservative Christian parents (and though some may disagree I still consider myself a conservative Christian). I was more worried about disappointing them than anything else (I mean, God already knew since my view of God does include omniscience). Initially it was a source of tension and anxiety but "love won out" (cliché I know but it does apply). I am sorry to hear about the way your sister is reacting and hope and pray that she will come to love her brother simply because he is her brother and let those issues over which she has no control be delivered to God's hands.
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