In Search of Meaning

Rest In Peace Romeo

2010-04-01T06:21:00.000-07:00

Last night at 8:40pm my friend and companion for nearly 12 years passed away. Romeo was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy after suffering a saddle thrombus from which he thankfully recovered. It was simply a matter of time so my partner and I were treating symptoms. He was on Plavix and two diuretics and the last weeks of his life we rented an oxygen concentration unit and created for him a little oxygen tent to help him breath when he suffered an episode but last night the fight was simply too much for him.

It was about 12 years ago when I was living in Sacrament that Romeo found me. It was not the best of time in my life. I was with someone whose favorite past times seemed be either convincing me that I was so lucky to have him because no one else would want me or simply physically abusing me. My self esteem was nonexistent and I was so afraid of being alone because no one would want me that I put up with the mental and physical abuse. Then one day as we were going out I had to run back to the house for something and found this little white fuzzball on the welcome mat. He was so cute and so tiny. I was afraid to do anything at the moment not knowing where his momma was so I told him that if he was still there when I got back I would bring him in. Well four hours later when we returned he was in the same spot so we brought him into the house and found him something we thought he would eat, played with him a bit and then fixed him a little bed on the couch. When I woke up I found him sprawled on my tummy and when I petted him he started purring. I asked my partner if I could keep him and he begrudgingly said yes but it was my responsibility (obviously he was far too busying being a kept man to be bothered taking care of a kitty) so I set up an appointment with a vet in the area and began bonding with my new found friend. When I took him to the vet for a checkup I was asked what his name was and I said "Romeo" because he took to me quickly, always following me around, curling up in my lap, rubbing his face against mine and sleeping with me... in short showing me love.

Not long after meeting Romeo I found the strength to leave my abusive relationship.

Romeo and I had several adventures including traveling throughout the country (he was always a hit with children on the flights). When I partnered up with someone and we moved to San Diego Romeo came with us. Every day when I came home I would see him sitting in the window sill and as soon as I shut the car door he would jump down and run to the door to meet me. Regardless of the other domestic situation I was always greeted by Romeo with a purr and a rub against the leg. He would always look up at me as if to say "Welcome home daddy". Regardless of where I was in the house he would be with me, sleeping on the bed, sitting on the wash basin while I showered, in the kitchen with me when I cooked... always watching after me no matter where I was as if to tell me it would be OK, he was there to take care of me.

After six years my partner left and it was once again just Romeo and me and it seemed that Romeo, ever by my side, was closer than before. He helped me through separation and was once again watching closely anyone I brought home (somewhat embarrassingly during certain intimate moment... I think Romeo had a touch of the voyeur in him). Then I met my current partner who took to Romeo immediately and more importantly Romeo to him. It was a long engagement (well, long in gay years) and not once did Romeo voice disapproval.

After a couple of years of the three of us together and the bonds growing ever tighter Romeo had his traumatic episode where he was diagnosed with suffering the effects of a saddle thrombosis and further investigation showed he suffered from hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. The prognosis was not good (about 50% of kitties who suffer the thrombosis become paralyzed and are put to sleep). My partner and I went into caregiver mode with medications and special foods, getting an oxygen concentrator for when his breathing became labored, whatever we could though I knew it was simply treating symptoms. During this time Romeo began to pull away a little bit, as if saying he didn't want us to watch him suffer. I also think he was still watching to see how my husband was reacting with me being the emotional wreck I was becoming. Fortunately for me he is made of stronger stuff and loved me even more, always giving me what I needed.

Last night it was fast. His episode didn't seem that bad, I thought I had caught it in its early stages but the medicine and the oxygen didn't seem to help as it had before. I laid on the floor next to his oxygen tend where he could see me and talked to him as he was panting. When he started to "moan" I told my husband through a waterfall of tears that it was time, I couldn't see him suffer any more. We quickly dressed, not more than 5 minutes total time but when we checked on him before taking him to the car he wasn't breathing. I reached in and petted him but there was no response. My friend, my protector, my Romeo was gone.

After bundling him up in his carrier we drove to the ER. It was like being in a funeral procession. I was losing it, my partner silent but his eyes were tearing up. We made it to the ER and after being taken into a private room I lost it. My partner made the arrangements and we said our goodbyes. When we got home we watched videos we had made of Romeo, talking about him and what he meant. Later that night I kept expecting to hear his paws patting on the floor and then feeling the thump on the bed as he joined us as he had for many years. When it didn't happen I cried myself to sleep.

This morning isn't any easier... the empty kitty bed in the living room where he would sometimes lay, the empty shelf in the TV console where he would curl up while we watched television, the kitty carrier, the food dish, all of the physical things showing me that he really was here and it wasn't all a dream or my imagination. These I have to deal with. I'll talk to his vet about the possibility of donating his personal effects to kitties less fortunate... I think he would like that.

In A Grief Observed the Christian writer C. S. Lewis provides us insight into his own hellish grief he experienced during the time following the death of his wife. As in the death of my own father I again with Lewis as things like

"Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not 'So there's no God after all,' but 'So this is what God's really like. Deceive yourself no longer.'

Our elders submitted and said, 'Thy will be done.' How often had bitter resentment been stifled through sheer terror and an act of love — yes, in every sense, an act — put on to hide the operation?

Of course it's easy enough to say that God seems absent at our greatest need because He is absent — non-existent. But then why does He seem so present when, to put it frankly, we don't ask for Him? "

And...

"But I find that this question, however important it may be in itself, is not after all very important in relation to grief. Suppose that the earthly lives she and I shared for a few years are in reality only the basis for, or prelude to, or earthly appearance of, two unimaginable, supercosmic, eternal somethings. Those somethings could be pictures as spheres or globes. Where the plane of Nature cuts through them — that is, in earthly life — they appear as two circles (circles are slices of spheres). Two circles that touched. But those two circles, above all the point at which they touched, are the very thing I am mourning for, homesick for, famished for. You tell me, 'she goes on.' But my heart and body are crying out, come back, come back. Be a circle, touching my circle on the plane of Nature. But I know this is impossible. I know that the thing I want is exactly the thing I can never get. The old life, the jokes, the drinks, the arguments, the lovemaking, the tiny, heartbreaking commonplace. On any view whatever, to say, 'H. is dead,' is to say, 'All that is gone.' It is a part of the past. And the past is the past and that is what time means, and time itself is one more name for death, and Heaven itself is a state where 'the former things have passed away.'

Talk to me about the truth of religion and I'll listen gladly. Talk to me about the duty of religion and I'll listen submissively. But don't come talking to me about the consolations of religion or I shall suspect that you don't understand. "

But in the end the experiences of having loved, been show what love is like, learning through the relationship becomes evident and we have an even greater strength to make it through life than we had before. If you haven't read it I suggest you do, it is powerful and moving.

Personally (and no I can't support it with any amount of theological certitude) I think Romeo knew he could pass on the job to talking care of me to my husband. Romeo was sent to me when I most needed someone to love me. He was always with me, seemingly closer when times were harder. He was the one who always watched for me, the one happy to have me around. After two and a half years with my partner I think Romeo knew I had finally found someone who loved me as unconditionally as he did, someone he could trust to watch over me, to care for me and protect me. He was confident that he would lay his weary and sickly body down and go to his reward knowing that I would continue to be surround by love.

I miss you my friend and if my best wishes come true I will see you again. Until then I will see you in my mind's eye strong and bright eyed, chasing butterflies and resting in God's light purring with contentment.

The Passing Of My Father

2009-10-11T23:58:00.000-07:00

This morning my father breathed his final breath and departed this world. For those of us who believe Scripture and who do not "in this life only... hope in Christ" (1 Cor. 15:19a) he is in a better place. Even the most secular minded among us can say that he no longer suffers, but the placing of his, and my own, faith in puts the outcome immeasurably better than the simple cessation of pain and struggle. His passing is one of a change of address. That which really is my father is simply no longer housed in the body that I have known for 47 years, but is with the one who made the body of Adam from dust. He is enjoying the presence of his Lord and Savior. I don't view him as "gone" but rather he has stepped away for a while but I will see him again some day. I don't say "adieu" but rather "au revoir" (though I suppose in one technical sense "adieu" fits if one takes its literal translation of "to God"... but enough of my Sheldon side for the moment).

I haven't cried, even when I returned to pick up his remaining personal items after my mom and sister had left and I kissed him goodbye. I feel sad but no tears. I kept expecting to see him breathe again, thinking that it was simply a pause of breathing caused by the morphine. When I reached a 10 count I came back to reality knowing that he indeed passed. I called my partner and talked to him. I didn't cry and he did his best to comfort me but I didn't really feel like I needed comforting. I wrote an email to my boss and told her I would be taking bereavement leave and since my family home is out of cell coverage I would not be able to work. I didn't cry.

Honestly, at the moment, I don't feel "sad". I don't feel a sense of loss. I worry about my mother and my sister, my two young nephews (one of whom I know does not fully understand what happened tonight so part of my duty now is to help him through this), but I do not cry. I know it is coming, but now is not my time. It was the same way wither Jerry when after a long battle with AIDS he ceased his struggles and passed away in my arms. I didn't cry then. I had responsibilities that precluded succumbing to emotional despondency but it did come (so do not worry about me, I know there is still some part of me that is human). Probably after I return to San Diego a time will come when I walk down to the beach and do my own impression of Demosthenes though rather than simply practice oration there will come a cry from me that will shake the foundations of the palace of Poseidon in ways it has not seen since the war with the Titans.

What will take time will be getting used to the idea that I cannot call poppa to talk about Mizzou sports or make fun of Democrats. I can't call to tell him of the little triumphs I will have or to seek his advice. When I talk to mom I will have to catch myself before I blurt out "you and dad" or "tell poppa I said 'hi'".

It's 2:43 AM and my mind is weary yet amazing in what it pulls up from its depths in times like this. Rather than try to make sense of it I will close with the following quotes (I may butcher parts so please excuse the typing and punctuation):

"If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men. But Christ has indeed been raised from the dead, the first-fruits of those who have fallen asleep. For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead comes also through a man. For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive. But each in his own turn: Christ, the first-fruits; then, when he comes, those who belong to him. Then the end will come, when he hands over the kingdom to God the Father after he has destroyed all dominion, authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death." - 1 Corinthians 15: 19 - 26

Thy name is not among the great, as some count greatness,
Neither pen nor sword have brought thee glory,
No man called thee lord, with press of lackeys fawning at they gate.
...
Thine was a loftier dower — a nobler fate.
And tribute shall be paid in hearts, not gold.
And of such kind we pay thee of our best.
Let Caesars take their homage as of old.
They have their pleasure,leave to God the rest.
Content thee, if through ages yet untold,
The little children rise and call thee blest.
- Alsager Hay Hill

The Road goes ever on and on
Out from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
Let others follow it who can.
Let them a journey new begin.
But I at last with weary feet
Will turn towards the lighted inn,
My evening-rest and sleep to meet.
- Bilbo Baggins (JRRT)

Good night poppa.

I'm Been Saying Something Similar For A Long Time...

2009-06-21T22:27:00.000-07:00

Just be sure to stick around for the end...

Protect Marriage, Protect Children, Prohibit Divorce - watch more funny videos

The Ban Stands

2009-05-26T11:53:00.000-07:00

This just in...

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) – California's supreme court backed a ban on gay marriage on Tuesday, ruling six-to-one that a voter-approved proposition defining marriage as between a man and a woman could stand.

The court, which last year unexpectedly opened the door to same-sex unions in the most populous U.S. state, bowed to the rule of the majority of California voters who passed the ban known as Proposition 8 last November.

But the court also said the roughly 18,000 marriages that took place in the state before the November ban remained valid since the ban was not retroactive.

(You can read the full report here)

How sad, but I knew this would be the outcome. Now two fights will brew over the next campaign cycle, one from each side... one, to reverse Prop 8 (that is, another California constitutional amendment), and two, to nullify the existing gay marriages that have been allowed to stand since California does not recognize marriage outside of the heterosexual definition.

Think of what this has created in a supposedly "liberal" state. California is not liberal in any known sense of the word. As I said at the BBQ Sunday, California is not liberal, it's loony. We have Prop 13 but then we have communities with Mello-Roos attached to get around Prop 13. We now have a set of circumstances where a small subset of same-sex couples are married but no more can be. We have married gays in this state, but the state does not acknowledge same-sex marriage from any other state. This isn't liberal, this is split-personality if not outright schizophrenia.

I Agree

2009-04-30T10:24:00.000-07:00

In all the flak over the Miss U.S.A. competition where Perez Hilton was a "judge", I honestly feel that Ms Prejean came out the better. Though I disagree with her, she simply stated what she believed was right in the matter of allowing same-sex marriage. Mr. Hilton simply showed how classless he is with his rabid retort which I was saying he did primarily to promote his own "celebrity". I was feeling rather alone in my assessment as proponents of each side of the issue took what they wanted and attacked like starving dogs over a bone. I was glad to read this editorial. I may be in the minority but at least I am not alone :-)

Braggin' Again

2009-04-02T09:52:00.000-07:00

My oldest nephew was given honorable mention for All District Honors in basketball, quite an honor when you consider it was voting by the entire district as well as the regional sports press.

The similarities between him and myself are obvious. :-)

If You Go To Baja Betty's...

2009-03-23T15:48:00.000-07:00

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BY PARTICIPATING IN THE TAP PROJECT, YOU ARE HELPING TO REDUCE THE NUMBER OF NEEDLESS DEATHS TO ZERO--JUST ONE SINGLE DOLLAR RAISED CAN PROVIDE A CHILD WITH SAFE DRINKING WATER FOR 40 DAYS.

HELP US MAKE A DIFFERENCE
COME DINE WITH US DURING WORLD WATER WEEK, MARCH 22-28, 2009.

Penn And Teller On The First Amendment

2009-03-20T13:27:00.000-07:00

There are a few "F bombs" but the ideas are dead on...

Gotta Brag

2009-03-19T09:54:00.000-07:00

This morning I received the following IM from my sister regarding my nephew who is in the first grade:

the school sent H*****'s progress report. Straight A's but they also sent testing results. He is at 4th grade 4th month in reading & scored a 99% which stated that only 1% of kids his age in the NATION (sic) scored higher. He was at 2nd grade 9th month on math & a 94% on the test. Teacher said that was the highest reading score she has ever had!

That Was An Argument?

2009-03-16T07:34:00.000-07:00

In the Sunday edition of the San Diego Union Tribune retired Navy Captain J. F. Kelly, Jr. submitted an op-ed supporting the current policy of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (DADT). If only all opponents to DADT were so weak-minded, this issue would have been concluded years ago and gay men and women would be serving openly. Here is my letter to the editor that I submitted (whether or not it goes beyond this blog I don't know):

That was supposed to be a reasoned argument for "Don't Ask, Don't Tell"? Please. The entire opinion piece can be broken down into three parts each of which are easily refuted: First, gays shouldn't serve because "a large proportion of the population and a number o f mainstream religions and cultures find [gay behavior] immortal and abhorrent". Please, "Tailhook" wasn't a gay scandal. Large numbers of people and religions and cultures find divorce abhorrent but how many people in the military are divorced? Bad road to travel down Mr. Kelly. Second, the privacy issue. Mr. Kelly talks about the military having to separate genders and such actions are too costly to do for gays serving openly. How about why we had to create separate quarters. Societal proprieties demanded it, but it was also to protect the women from the men! Are you saying we would need to protect the few gays who would serve openly from the vast majority of heterosexual men? How silly Mr. Kelly. Even sillier would be the notion of our fighting force having men (and women) of such delicate sensibilities as to be intimidated by being in the same shower/bathroom/berthing with gays (which they already do Mr. Kelly). Finally, Mr. Kelly states that the military does discriminate and provides a list, yet does not says why the military discriminates so I will provide the proper commentary for some of them: overweight (because they can't physically do the job), physically impaired (because they can't physically do the job), mentally impaired (because they can't mentally do the job), those with limited intelligence (because they can't mentally do the job). Their inability to do the job makes them unsuited for such positions. How, Mr. Kelly, does being gay make one physically or mentally unable to do the job at hand?

Reading crap like this makes my blood boil. They have the right to make a case against DADT, but if they can't do any better than this then they really need to keep quiet because they simply make their cause look silly. They're much better off saying gays can't serve because we don't like the idea of f*ggots and be done with it.

Same Crap, Different Pile

2009-03-11T19:09:00.000-07:00

Here's the opening to an article titled Obama decries earmarks, signs law with 9000 of them:

WASHINGTON — As a candidate, Barack Obama once said that a president has to be able to do more than one thing at a time. Wednesday he proved it, though not in the way he had in mind.

He criticized pork barrel spending in the form of "earmarks," urging changes in the way that Congress adopts the spending proposals. Then he signed a spending bill that contains nearly 9,000 of them, some that members of his own staff shoved in last year when they were still members of Congress .

"Let there be no doubt, this piece of legislation must mark an end to the old way of doing business, and the beginning of a new era of responsibility and accountability," Obama said.

He said, however, that it was crucial for him to sign the $410 billion bill as soon as it arrived at the White House from Congress because it's needed to finance much of the government for the rest of this fiscal year. It was largely written last year but was held back while Republican George W. Bush was president because he opposed it.
...

Must mark an end? If this man had any real fortitude he would not have signed it and said "This piece of legislation is from the old way of doing business. As we are now in a new era of responsibility and accountability I will not sign it. Congress must do better in affirming this pledge to the American People" (or at least something to that effect). Two things to note from the article (besides Obama showing how he is no different than any other politician):

Some of his own staff were responsible for some of the earmarks. Lovely. So much for his pristine, hand-chosen cabinet.

This piece was held back from Bush because he opposed it. Interesting. If Bush was part of the "old way of doing business" and he opposed pork at this level while Obama who signs it is the "new era", I think I would rather have the old way back.

Who Else Would You Expect?

2009-03-06T17:22:00.001-08:00

You Are Most Like Ronald Reagan

People tend to think you're a god - or that you almost ruined the country.

But even if people do disagree with you, they still fall victim to your charms!

What Modern US President Are You Most Like?

Tough Words Of Common Sense

2009-03-05T10:45:00.000-08:00

"The loss of confidence is pervasive. There isn't any magic bullet here that's going to save Citi or Bank of America. The only thing that might save them is if the government comes in and sponsors a bankruptcy," said John Schloegel, a vice president of Capital Cities Asset Management in Austin, Texas.

"Until we have some meaningful discussion about doing the right things instead of just throwing money at things like AIG and General Motors, we're not going to solve the crisis we're in."

About $170 billion into AIG so far. To quote Leon from Blade Runner, "Wake up! Time to die!"

When You Look At What He Said...

2009-02-26T15:56:00.001-08:00

Some quick hits about President Obama's speech from Factcheck.org:

President Obama's first speech to a joint session of Congress was stuffed with signals about the new direction his budget will take and meant-to-be reassuring words about the economy. But it was also peppered with exaggerations and factual misstatements.

* He said "we import more oil today than ever before." That's untrue. Imports peaked in 2005 and are substantially lower today.

* He claimed his mortgage aid plan would help "responsible" buyers but not those who borrowed beyond their means. But even prominent defenders of the program including Fed Chairman Bernanke and FDIC chief Bair concede foolish borrowers will be aided, too.

* He said the high cost of health care "causes a bankruptcy in America every 30 seconds." That's at least double the true figure.

* He flubbed two facts about American history. The U.S. did not invent the automobile, and the transcontinental railroad was not completed until years after the Civil War, not during it.

* He claimed that his stimulus plan "prevented the layoffs" of 57 police officers in Minneapolis. In fact, it's far more complicated than that, and other factors are also helping to save police jobs.

Follow the link at the top, check the details.

I Miss Swagger

2009-02-26T08:45:00.001-08:00

Let's face it, yes some corporate executives did pad their pockets and were more interested in their own bottom line than the bottom line of their company, but definitely not all. Did anyone here Obama's address where he painted all corporate CEOs with the same brush of how they supposedly took taxpayer money to host lavish parties and increase their personal wealth? Personally, I would like to see proof of that, I want to see where CEOs said "Oh look, government money! I'll reinstate my mind-boggling raise and then use what is left of this money to throw a big party!" President Obama, shame on you... you should know better. And shame on those blowhards in Congress who for the most part have NEVER produced anything but bills taking people to task for making money. Hey, with all this "share the pain" talk from the party on the left, where is the salary reduction and perk reduction for you pompous Caesars? Why aren't you "sharing the pain" with the rest of us? Even more so, where are the entrepreneurs telling the truth to these government officials?

Note to Obama and the Democrat Congress: Please stop talking about helping the middle class. None of you have any idea what it means to be middle class and you have no idea how to really help. Why don't you take a real job and just see what it means to be a middle-class American?

Obama's Non-State of the Union Address

2009-02-24T19:58:00.000-08:00

Funny, I was told all day long that President Obama's speech was to be on the economy. What I heard sounded more like a state of the union address where the first 10 minutes of the 55 minute speech was making sure no one could ever think that his policies were the problem, that it was ALL former President Bush's fault.

* sigh *

He sounded like a little kid saying "Don't blame me. I didn't do it."

Fine, we get it. You're the new kid, but you have to start taking responsibility. You have to also start listening to your own rhetoric. Disagreeing with you is not the same as partisan politics unless you truly believe you already know all the answers in which case stop playing around and trying to fake consensus.

Spot The Humor

2009-02-18T10:06:00.000-08:00

The following is a quote from an "analyst" about Obama's extra $275 billion plan for mortgages announced this morning:

"This plan is good, but it is unnecessarily complicated," said Michael Cheah, senior portfolio manager at AIG SunAmerica Asset Management in New Jersey.

Did ya find it?

Taxifornia

2009-02-17T19:53:00.000-08:00


Results                          
Estimated additional sales taxes...................$  374    
Estimated additional income taxes..................$  634
Estimated additional VLF fees......................$   50
Estimated additional gas taxes.....................$   81
Estimated loss in dependent tax credits............$    0 
Total annual personal cost of proposed budget......$1,139

Lovely. The country is dropping further and further into hard times and those geniuses in Sacramento want to raise my taxes by an estimated $1,139 per year. To find your impact you can play the game here. Not even a tax credit for lubrication for this screwing we're about to get. If the Republicans cannot hold the line it's time to seriously rethink my allegiance to this party. There are ways out of the mess without forcing the hardworking citizens of this state to even more taxes. What's even worse, with the Obama money coming from the federal government they are not going to reduce the burden on the taxpayer but rather put even more spending into the budget.

Anyone outside of CA looking for a pretty damned good technical manager can just email me the offer directly.

Valentine's Day

2009-02-15T17:44:00.000-08:00

My beau and I were lucky to get to spend Valentine's Day together. After his lovely present for my birthday (which I blogged about here) it was my turn to spoil him a bit. We got gussied up and had a wonderful dinner at Laurel. The atmosphere, the wine, the food, the time together was magical. After a two-hour dinner we bundled up and walked up the street to Top of the Park for a nightcap and one of the best views of downtown San Diego.

Today he texted me and thanked me for a wonderful evening. I told him that what made the night wonderful was that two people who love each other spent it together. I believe that with all my heart.

How Much Is That Stimulus In The Window?

2009-02-12T15:55:00.000-08:00

At least $3.27 trillion...

Yes, trillion, with a "t"

Who believes that these programs, once initiated, will ever be pared back much less eliminated?

Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) asked the Congressional Budget Office to estimate the impact of permanently extending the 20 most popular provisions of the stimulus bill. What did the CBO find? As you can see from the table below, the true 10 year cost of the stimulus bill $2.527 trillion in in spending with another $744 billion cost in debt servicing. Total bill for the Generational Theft Act: $3.27 trillion.

Details here.

Figuring Out The "Stimulus" Package

2009-02-12T07:18:00.000-08:00

I think I got it. As with most things the government does it was a simple oversight. Once I made the correction it all makes perfect sense. Obama's speech writer simply omitted one word, but once that word is inserted it became crystal clear...

Instead of simply saying "stimulus package" President Obama meant to say "negative stimulus package". Really Barack, for someone of such supposed rhetroical skills you should have read your speech much more closely before delivering it, it creates too much confusion.

When "god" Speaks

2009-02-07T17:19:00.000-08:00

Obama must really believe himself divine, his word is sacred and not to be questioned. This man, who has never been tested in any sense in his adult life, seems to think that honest differences in though are not to be discussed, especially when it differs from his own omniscience. Our earth-bound divine leader recently said "We can't expect relief from the tired old theories that, in eight short years, doubled the national debt, threw our economy into a tailspin, and led us into this mess in the first place". So honest discussion and debate about a second multibillion dollar "stimulus" package is not on the table, we are just to trust him? Right, sorry, I forgot he expects unwavering faith.

I really wonder if he even hears himself or if he thinks that whatever he says must be right? Funny, people said they hated this aspect of Bush yet here it is again (just that the leader is a "D" rather than an "R"). If Obama REALLY took his own words seriously he would think about where this money is coming from (but it's hard to expect that from someone who never really worked). If he wanted to do away with the "tired old theories" of the last eight years (of which a quarter of that lead by the Democrats) he would:

Cut spending

Let people who work keep more of their money by lowering tax rates rather than those stupid little tax credits they propose

If they want to give away money, take a portion of this humongous spending package and distribute it to those who work so they (that is, the worker) can start to stimulate the economy. This will work faster than any of that central planning BS they contemplate now

Make a good-faith effort toward the American people by cutting out all the crap that has been put into the package. A sizable chunk has nothing to do with "stimulus" efforts but looks more like a "Here's our chance to buy more votes under the guise of doing some good".

If our Economist-in-chief wants to stimulate business, cut or repeal the corporate income tax. Corporate income tax has never made good sense because if you think about it such income often gets taxed two or three times as it travels through the system. Why slap on an additional 35%?

Interestingly enough, this administration doesn't seem to know that to encourage sustainable growth they should eliminate bad policy, not add new layers.

Just What Is Obama Sorry For?

2009-02-05T07:20:00.000-08:00

Just when I get my hopes up with his ethics requirements he turns into another politician. At least one of his appointees withdrew her nomination because of taxes (how is it that the party who thinks we worker bees should pay taxes seem to have so many problems paying them?). Then during his "I messed up" speech what it sounds like the problem was had to do with the message rather than it actually being wrong. He was upset that they appeared to be sending the message that there were two sets of standards. Appeared to be? There were two sets of standards and Obama himself built in that two-tiered system by allowing for wavers from the ethics requirements. If you listen to what he said in his mea culpa, it isn't he was sorry for giving his full support to people who had such problems but the image it created.

For a man swept in by "change" it sure looks like business as usual.

Generational Differences

2009-02-03T20:52:00.000-08:00

Of course, I am Drew Carey (guess Tio Ely is Mimi).

Weekend of Celebrations

2009-02-02T09:56:00.001-08:00

My birthday weekend was wonderful and the fact that two dear friends shared their anniversary makes the it even more so (congratulations Cory and Elbert, may you have many more). Friday night Cory and Elbert took me to dinner at Cafe Bleu where we were joined by Heather for food, wine, and conversation (I'll critique the restaurant and wine on my other blog). My beau was unable to join but I was soon with him for the rest of the night where he presented me with a candle-topped carrot cake and sang "Happy Birthday" to me.

The next morning we bucked the trend of newly-found austerity, picked up our friend Sarah, and met Cory, Elbert, and Heather at Orfila Winery to start a day of wine tasting (I'll review the wines at the other blog). A stretch limo picked us up for a ride to and around Temecula to spend the day at various wineries (again, see other blog for details). After a day of drinking, er, tasting and laughing we had dinner at Buca di Beppo in Mira Mesa where we were joined by Gabe and filled out the evening with good food and embarrassment for your truly as I had to stand on a chair holding a candelabra while the place sang "Happy Birthday". After dropping Sarah off it was time for my beau and I to head home and relax (being the old men that we are).

Sunday was sunny and relaxing. After breakfast at Shades we saw Gran Torino where I had a good cry, then it was off to Hillcrest for lunch, walking around, and relaxing. Cory and Elbert celebrated their anniversary Sunday so we pretty much left them alone, content to spend our time together and talking about the future.

So thanks to everyone who made the weekend special for me. You will never truly know how much such friendship is valued.

46

2009-01-30T06:24:00.000-08:00

46 is the largest even integer that can't be expressed as a sum of two abundant numbers.

46 is the 13th semiprime.

There are 46 human chromosomes.

The code for international direct dial phone calls to Sweden (ewwww... don't like this one).

Code 46 was a pretty bad cyperpunkish movie.

On this day, January 30, someone whose name is firmly entrenched in the annals of American history was born. A man whose name is being invoked more and more frequently in the media and the halls of power. Depending on your political persuasion it is a name spoke in deep reverence or with derision, made to be either the right hand of God or the left buttock of Lucifer. Yes ladies and gentlemen I am speaking of....

Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

Oh, yeah, today's my birthday too (sheesh, this year I am connect to both FDR * AND * Sweden, God help me).

Sadly, I Don't Think Obama Understands This

2009-01-29T14:13:00.000-08:00

I'm not Catholic but I have to say that Catholicvote.com has some powerful videos over this message. On another note, this will not be shown during the Super Bowl. Why do I say this? Catholicvote.com offered to buy time to play this "commercial" but it was rejected. Three words to this group... "Don't give up".

And These Are The Guys In Charge Of Your Taxes

2009-01-27T11:57:00.000-08:00

President Obortion

2009-01-25T08:55:00.000-08:00

Well, we can't say we weren't expecting it but I was shocked that President Obama made undoing the "Mexico City Policy" allowing funding to organizations that provide abortions (link) such a high priority. The policy, implemented by Reagan, repealed by Clinton and reestablished by Bush has again been overturned by Obama within three days of being sworn in as president. Apparently a "woman's right to choose" is of greater importance than almost anything else going on at the moment. Obama has always supported abortion rights regardless of the situation and reason. For such a supposedly smart man he just doesn't get it. I'm curious how his actions aren't political (as he claims in his own comments about his action) and it will be interesting to see how his supporters will spin this action as being "pro-family" when the end result is to allow elimination of a family member.

The discussion about abortion is often heated and more knee-jerk than thoughtful. Recently I was talking to a highly educated person who actually made the statement that an embryo was no different than any other mass of tissue such as skin cells or a tumor (shocking but that was what was said). It was a bit sad that I had to point out that one major difference was you could not take a skin sample, implant it in a uterus and nine months later have a baby emerge.

Modern science is showing how viability can be pushed back closer and closer to the time of conception. For someone who claims to want to put science back in the place it belongs, I wish President Obama would pay attention to the science he supposedly reveres.

Obama's Speech

2009-01-20T10:43:00.000-08:00

I have to say, I am a bit disappointed. For someone who is proclaimed to be one of the great orators of his age I found it a bit flat, but then again I actually listened to the words. Unlike the crowds who gazed with rapture at President Obama, I listened, analyzed, weighed the words.

I firmly agree with him on the idea of personal responsibility, that many of our problems today are "a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices". Sadly he focused a bit too much on "greed" and not not enough of the failure to make hard choices. Sorry, but no one had a gun held to their head and forced to sign loan papers when they knew darn good and well that (1) the markets do NOT always go up and (2) they couldn't make the payments at the end of the teaser rate period. Obama gives an interesting list of problems but fails to actually tie them to anything. For example, he said "our schools fail too many", but no tie back to his responsibility theme. Mr. President, why do "our schools fail too many"? Please, don't tell me it's money because if we are both honest with each other we know it isn't. How about parents not making the hard choice of doing without to be more involved with the education of their children?

I found this interesting: "On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics." Now this is interesting, since it has been his side of the aisle that has spat the more vitriolic of statements. Of course, one moment of fun for yours truly was Obama's butting heads with Pelosi and Reid. If he continues to do this he will earn much more of my support, so I will give him the benefit of the doubt. How he handles their tunnel vision of war crimes trials against Bush and Cheney will go far in how I view the man.

This one sent chills down my spine, the idea of "the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness." First of all, there is no such promise of all being equal unless you want to talk soteriology, yet that is not what Obama meant here. We are NOT all equal. We each have different skills, different inclinations, different abilities. The message he is sending is a bit muddled.

I found this one of the better lines in the speech: "Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom." The question is, what will the Obama administration do to help such people?

This statement puzzled me: "We will restore science to its rightful place". What "rightful place" is that? When was science removed from whatever that "rightful place" is? Such statements to me sound like the silly leftist "fair share" statement when it comes to taxation. Who gets to make such definitions?

I agree with this statement up to a point: "The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end." If he stopped at the hyphen I would have liked it more, but Obama says that government should meddle in the lives of people. Where is the responsibility of the individual? Given that most people seem to think that Social Security is "broken" and doesn't work, will he end it? He said earlier that public education has failed, will that end as well?

I find it interesting that Obama says "know that America is a friend of each nation". Really? What about countries who deem us as "the great Satan" (and I'm not just talking about the French here). How far does that idea of "friend" go?
I'm not sure how much that goes with his much, much better statement "We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you." I find that Obama, in trying to be the world's "good guy", a sorta global president, he is pledging far too much outside the U.S. before we really clean up our own house (read the three paragraphs or so following the above quotes).

I think what I have the most problem with is the muddled message this sends to those who pay attention to what he says. But, as I said to a co-worker this morning, unlike the rabid liberals I will NOT say that Obama is not my president. He is, and when he and I agree I will support him to the utmost of my ability. Where we disagree I will speak out to any who will listen. This, I think, is the real duty of a patriotic American. So now, it's time to see what he will do. Time for talk and speeches is over, now is the time for action.

God bless America.

Obama's Magic Numbers

2009-01-10T19:28:00.000-08:00

Now while I have a few things to quibble about with Obama's economic plan, one thing I find fascinating is how over the matter of a couple of weeks the purported number of jobs it would create has jumped from 2.5 million to 3 million to 4.1 million. Wow! Of course, these numbers come from his own economic council. How nice it would be to live in a world where the president could miraculously create jobs at this rate. Of course, what else can we expect from this one?

Still, one hopes for the best. I just wish he and his followers didn't try to make it out like his bowel movements produce gold. That makes him and his no better than the current fanatics in power.

A Tail Of Two Rings

2009-01-05T11:44:00.000-08:00

You may have noticed that the last few weeks I have been wearing two rings, one on the left hand and one on the right hand. The ring on the left hand is the ring that my beau gave me to "seal the deal" as he likes to put it. The one on my right hand is my father's high school ring. When I was home for Thanksgiving he gave that ring to me. Dad didn't go to college, but he wanted me to have his academic ring. That ring just fits on my right hand. Now ever time I look at my hands I see symbols of the two men who love me unconditionally. Now when I look my hands I cannot help but smile and feel loved.

An Andy Rooney Moment

2008-12-31T11:56:00.000-08:00

Did you ever wonder why the good guys in sci-fi movies have blue lights while bad guys tend to have green lights?

Painless Giving

2008-12-31T11:53:00.000-08:00

When I travel I tend to fly American Airlines and have found a way to give painlessly every time I do so I thought I would pass it on. Here is the information from The Center in San Diego:

Flying somewhere?

Every time you book a ticket with American Airlines, remember to take The Center with you. When making your reservations, include The Center’s “Business ExtrAA Account#: 527593.” You will still receive all your AA miles and The Center will earn airline tickets used to create vacation packages for silent auctions at our major events or to send staff to important trainings in different cities.

Flip-Side To Oedipus

2008-12-30T21:04:00.000-08:00

I'm not a fan of Freud and especially not of his proposed Oedipus Complex but in some form it seems to exist in contemporary psychology. The idea of competition of son with father for whatever reason and the "trauma" for both when the son comes into his own and finally succeeds/supersedes the father seems to continually appear in book after book on human relationships. Honestly I have never gone through this. I have never thought of myself in competition with my father in any way, shape, or form for anything.

Recent events have made me think though of a "flip-side" to Freud's idea. Again, it isn't anything new but I have not seen this type of comparison in the books I have read (perhaps because it is too folksy or too sentimental), but my flip-side is rather than thinking about competition between father and son, focus on the moment when the father expresses his joy for the type of man the son has become. Rather than traumatic and a source of familial tension this view creates bonding and strengthening of the familial unit.

OK, so why I am bringing this up? Today I received a card from my father. As some of you know (but most don't) modern medicine has pronounced my father's condition as terminal, metastasized cancer in several organs and lymph nodes. In the card is a very simple message. My father told me how much he loves me and how proud he is to have me for his son. Now this isn't the first time he has said it, but like most fathers the message had come when I have done something or if I was sad and full of self-hatred (a common condition of mine in the past). This time there was nothing I had done, nothing going on in my life which prompted him to take pen in hand and write that message to me. He wanted me to know, once more and under no special conditions or causes that he is proud to have me for his son. When I read that I felt like I had arrived, that while we disagree, while I have not been the "perfect son", even through the "gay thing", he loves me and he is proud to have me as his son (I know that has to sound redundant but I love writing it). Because someone I view as a real man said this to me I felt like a man.

Perhaps I am so happy to have this written confirmation because I love him and an proud to be his son, but I will save that for a later post.

Thank you Dad.

I Coulda Been A Contender

2008-12-30T14:06:00.000-08:00

Just pulled my "Motley Fools" CAPS rating for my stock picks where you select a basket of stocks and predict whether it will outperform or underperform the S&P 500 within a given timeframe. The lifetime results I have are:

tpape's rating is 96.75.

* Score: 193.88 (92nd percentile)
* Accuracy: 100.00% (99th percentile)

A member's rating indicates his percentile rank in CAPS. tpape is outperforming 96.75% of all CAPS members. A member's score is the total percentage return of all his picks subtracting out the S&P. A member's accuracy is how often that member has made correct predictions

So out of >65000 people I'm doing OK. :-)

Poor Paul Krugman

2008-12-29T07:28:00.001-08:00

Give a guy a Nobel Prize and they think they can say anything and get away with it as we "mere mortals" should not question their pronouncements. Take the following from his editorial The era of good government appearing in the San Diego Union Tribune on 27-December-2008. Consider the following opening from the article:

... President-elect Barack Obama, riding a wave of revulsion over what conservatism has wrought, has said that he wants to "make government cool again."

What conservatism has wrought? What the heck is he talking about? As I have said time and time again on this site (and other conservatives have said before I started writing) President Bush is not a conservative. A conservative would not have done 3/4th of the things that he and his cabinet have done over the last eight years. But while Mr. Krugman doesn't name President Bush in the opening as the culprit (he does later in the article though which we will address in a moment), he says that conservatism is to blame. Mr. Krugman, please tell me how the conservative ideology is to blame when there hasn't been a conservative in power or a real conservative majority in over a decade. We have had Republicans in power in some way, shape, or form but not conservatives. For someone supposedly as smart as Mr. Krugman this is a terrible mistake to make... but of course it's not a mistake since Mr. Krugman is simply a "liberal" who is also a hack when it comes to trying to write about politics. As people who pay attention know, Republican does not equal conservative (just as Democrat does not equal liberal).

Now what about his attempted smearing of President Bush? Mr. Krugman says

Even when they failed on the job (as they so often did), they could claim that very failure as vindication of their anti-government ideology, a demonstration that the public sector can't do anything right.

Really? What "anti-government" ideology? Bush does not have an anti-government ideology. Sure, he has given a few speeches, but look at all the expanded government crap that Bush hath wrought (just for a few consider the massive drug program for Medicaid, "No Child Left Behind", and the current trillion-dollar plus "bailout"). Let's see Obama top THAT for expansion of government power and spending!

So Mr. Krugman, for a Nobel Prize winning economist and supposed "intellectual" (according to Wikipedia) please, please start getting your terms right. Such a supposedly smart man should not be making such mistakes.

Another Reason To Detest Elected Officials

2008-12-19T06:51:00.000-08:00

As most of you know California is about to go over the financial waterfall into the abyss. Rather than face realities, what did the democrat majority conspire to do? The b*stards tried to call a tax a fee. That's right, they engaged in post-modern slight of hand. Why did they do this? In California, in order to increase a tax you need a 2/3 majority vote but with the current composition of the assembly they can't get it. They then realized that to increase a fee you need only a simple majority! With the swindler's mindset firmly in place here is how it went... they simply replaced a portion of the tax with a fee! Let's say you have a $1.00 tax. What they would do is say that they repeal 60 cents of this tax and replace it with a fee. Now to raise that "fee" they simply need a majority vote! So they put a .75% sales tax increase, er, fee increase, a 2.5% "surcharge" on income taxes, a fee on gasoline, a business fee, all to a vote and it passed in a straight party-line vote. Disgusting. All I can say is, thank God for the "Governator" who said he would not sign this package.

Evil... these people who supposedly represent the will of the people just try to find ways to circumvent the will of the people. Of course the greatest shame falls on the California voter for putting these jokers in power time and time again.

Clarence Page and Gay Rights

2008-12-13T15:16:00.000-08:00

I have never liked Clarence Page, he's been too much of a sanctimonious liberal for me the entire duration of my political life, so my disagreement with his editorial in the 08-Dec-2008 edition of the San Diego Union Tribune isn't much of a shock, but it's just amazing how someone becomes so noted for writing virtually nothing. In the editorial Gay pride meets black prejudice Mr. Page opens with the following:

'Gay is the New Black,' declares the Dec 16 issue of The Advocate, a leading gay-oriented magazine. Well, not quite. How about "Gay is the new gray"?... I don't oppose same-sex marriage... But gay rights leaders should think twice before drawing too many compaisons to the right for racial equality. They are tragically correct to point out the murder, beatings, arson and other hate crimes that continue to be perpetrated against homosexuals. But the history and nature of our oppression is so different as to serve to alienate potential allies instead of winning them over.

Luckily I have that issue of The Advocate Mr. Page references. What is interesting is after opening with the above salvo he goes on to show two things. First, at best he skimmed the article, and second, he says nothing at all about why gay rights leaders need to think twice about making the comparison. In fact, as to the depths of his reading the article, when you do examine the contents of Michael Gross' article (titled "Pride and Prejudice", not "Gay is the New Black" which is on the cover of the 16-Dec-2008 issue of The Advocate), you almost get the sense that Mr Page simply lifted what he liked from the article and attacked the title, but the attack he proposed has virtually no substance in his editorial. In fact, had he bothered at all to read for content rather than skim for quotes he would have found Mr. Gross making the following statement:

Too many drew a simple parallel between our struggle and the black civil rights movement... There is someting to this, but it's dangerous territory, and we have to be careful not to lose our bearings here. Gay is the new black in only one meaningful way. At present we are the most socially acceptable targets for the kind of casual hatred that American society once approved for habitual use against black people... The comaprison becomes useful, though, in forcing us to consider the differences, between our civil rights struggle and theirs.

And I am sure that had Mr. Page read the article he would have liked the following penned by Mr. Gross:

Our oppression, by and large, is nowhere near as extreme as blacks' and we insult them when we make facile comparisons between our plights. Gay people have more resources thank blacks had in the 1960s. We are embedded in the power structure of every institution of this society.. Almost all gay people have the choice of passing [for straight]. Very few black people have that option.

* sigh *

Page's simple rendering of the the issue surfaces in his indignation of not only the comparison of gay rights and the Black civil rights movement (which if he had actually read the article he would have seen that was not the intent), but also that pointing out 70% of the black community voted for Proposition 8 which stripped away the right of gays to marry is mean spirited and a "bum rap". Now he does note that Mr. Gross says the same thing (wow, what a guy) but the sad thing is what typically happens when a liberal commentator writes about statistics... they speak about things of which they have no knowledge. In an effort to be politically correct both Mr. Page and Mr. Gross try to dance around the fact that ethincally blacks voted overwhelmingly for Proposition 8. So what if they are only 10% of the voting electorate, if they had voted in the same percentage as Whites or Asians (less than 50% of those blocks voted for for the proposition) Proposition 8 would have failed (after all it passed by a 52/48 vote so if Blacks voted for it less than 50% that two percentage point swing in the overall population would have been enough). Trying to make comparisons with how Mormons or Catholics or Evangelicals voted is a false comparison (especially evangelicals since ethnicity and religion here probably overlaps quite a bit and the percentage fact is focusing on race rather than religion or any other factor).

So the fact remains... 70% of people in the black community voted for Proposition 8. Now the question to ask is "Why?" I am sure that most gays had a false sense of security given the Obama affect as well as the usual support for what is often considered liberal causes (though I think a strong conservative case can be made for gay marriage), I was saying early on not to do this. Most people who have studied sociology know that there does run through the black (and hispanic community)of social conservatism (more aptly called perhaps traditionalism). Both Mr. Page and Mr. Gross point this out and use it to attack the statistic but rather than attacking the statistic with it we need to address this. Rather than dancing around the percentage of blacks voting against gay marriage we need to address their underlying reasons. If we can tie our issue to that of civil rights (and it is because civil rights means "everyone's right" or "the rights of the public"), we have the opportunity to swing the percentage around... and that is what politics has become, a game of percentages.

Everyone Can Give Something

2008-12-09T12:24:00.000-08:00

This morning I was listening to KFI and my heart was breaking. The station is doing a Radiothon for the Salvation Army. Donations are off from last year and service requests have nearly tripled due to the situation out there. Bill Handel was telling people just give up Starbucks for one day and donate the money and that anyone, regardless of how bad off you think you are, can donate something whether it is time, goods, or money. So acting on both good conservative principles (individuals give to help other individuals) and in some part in answer to a bit of a guilty conscious (thanks Mr. Handel) I upped my giving to a couple of local charities. Now I know I am blessed in so many ways and can do this, but if you can't that does not exempt you. Maybe you can help a friend or neighbor having a hard time, maybe you can take a couple of cans of food to a local food bank or donate time at a shelter... but you can do something to help people less fortunate than you. If we all did this, if we got off our behinds and did something no matter how small and tell ourselves "This is for those less fortunate than I am" just think of how much better off the world would be.

Just to help, here are some links to some of my favorites at this time of the year (and you don't even have to search the site as these links take you right to the donate page):

National:

Salvation Army

Feeding America

Children's Health Fund

San Diego:

Mama's Kitchen

And one for you east-side Missouri folks:

St. Louis Foodbank

Words From Yeats

2008-12-05T08:57:00.000-08:00

One of the benefits of being educated in a small, Midwest high school was being made to read and memorize famous works of literature. With all that has been happening in the news I am reminded of the following lines written by Yeats in his famous poem The Second Coming:

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

How Much Does It Take To Buy The Presidency?

2008-12-05T08:22:00.000-08:00

And here people worried about Ross Perot back in 1992. You can read the full story here.

WASHINGTON – Barack Obama, who rewrote the book on presidential fundraising, amassed more than $745 million during his marathon campaign, more than twice the amount obtained by his rival, Republican John McCain.

In his latest finance report, Obama reported raising $104 million in more than five weeks immediately before and after Election Day. It was his second biggest fundraising period and a fitting coda to a successful presidential bid that shattered fundraising records.

In the end, Obama still had $30 million left over.

Overall, Obama exceeded the combined finances of the two major parties' nominees four years ago. George W. Bush and John Kerry pulled in a total of $653 million in the 2004 primary and general election campaigns, including federal public financing money.

Of course, this was the man who repeatedly said that if his rival took federal funds so would he. First promise he broke... and no wonder.

Non Sequitur

2008-12-02T21:26:00.000-08:00

But Hunter will understand it...

World AIDS Day

2008-12-01T19:37:00.000-08:00

Today marks the 20th World AIDS Day... how many of you knew that? How many of you cared? I am old enough to remember, and participating in those early years of the fight. It's strange to look back at what we did then compared to the attitudes of today.

Tonight I have my own little memorial service. A glass of wine and some 15 year old picture of a young, smiling blond man I had in my life for a few years before he fell to the opportunistic diseases that is often the end of too-short life. Jerry Heard came out when he was 17 and had his first sexual encounter... six months later he tested positivie for the HIV virus. I met him right after I moved to St. Louis. We were part of a large group who met to see a local production of "Pippin" and have dinner afterward. He sat at the opposite end of the table from me but he kept looking at me and whispering to his friend. After a few awkward dates we decided to make a go of it. He was always up front with his disease and told me that if at any time I wanted out he understood (he said that was why most men didn't hang around him). I didn't leave. When his health was in steep decline I asked him what he wanted more than anything else... he said to be married. We were, if not in the eyes of any government we were in our eyes and our hearts. I was with him when he died, holding him in my arms. He was 25.

So today, as I have entered a relatively new chapter in my life, on this 20th annual World AIDS DAY I am thinking of how HIV has impacted my life. I am sure many of you have more stories you can add to mine. What we have to remember is that the fight is NOT over. There is no vaccine, there is no cure. We have no solid evidence that long-term application of the new drug "cocktails" (with apologies to Larry Kramer who says that cocktails are supposed to make you feel good while his HIV cocktails gives him severe intestinal problems) can be tolerated and while in the short term a better quality of life exists, after almost 30 years of it being out in the open we still have not beaten this enemy.

What Do You Get For 7 Trillion Dollars?

2008-11-25T10:40:00.001-08:00

I heard this over the weekend but just in case you haven't, you're wonderful government has committed 7 TRILLION DOLLARS to clean up the mess (read about it here). Given that our current GDP is about $14.5 trillion, this means we've committed roughly half of everything produced this year, both goods and services, to this catastrophe!

Bastards!

But wait, there's more. As of November 19, 2008, the total U.S. federal debt was $10.6 trillion, about $37,316 for each U.S. resident. Of this amount, debt held by the public was roughly $6.3 trillion! Adding unfunded Medicaid, Social Security, Medicare, veterans' pensions, and similar obligations we come up with (drum roll please)...

$59.1 trillion, or $516,348 per household.

I want to see bodies. I want not only CEOs do the perp walk, but those f*cking people in DC to do time as well (there's enough blame to spread around, so the ranks of both Democrats and Republicans will be thinned)... and I want my money back. I want their salaries for the last 10 years paid back for allowing this crap to happen. I want them publicly shamed and humiliated.

God help us all.

Where Rush Is Wrong

2008-11-23T07:53:00.000-08:00

I generally like Rush Limbaugh. Call it two Missourians sticking together but after 17 years of his show I still enjoy listening to him from time to time and on many issues we are in agreement. One recent area of disagreement (and a key on regarding the identity and future of the Republican Party) is his reaction to those who are saying the Republican Party needs to move forward in several areas. An example of his reaction to people like David Brooks, Peggy Noonan, and Christopher Buckley can be found here. But as often as he is right, here I think the great MahaRushie is wrong. What helped bring this to light was a short interview on the DVD Mr. Conservative from another conservative thinker, George Will. The question put out was whether or not Barry Goldwater became more liberal as he became older. Liberals like Al Franken were giddy in saying he had but George Will put a more thoughtful idea forward. He said that issues like gays in the military were not key in the years of Goldwater's era. What Goldwater did was take his well-thought ideals of what it meant to be a conservative and applied them to these new issues and came down on the side of literal interpretation of the Constitution and freedom to live one's life with minimal interference by the government (the bedrocks of Conservatism) and said "Nothing prevents it, so let 'em do it". Conservatism doesn't mean intellectual stagnation just as the attempts by Brooks et al does not mean giving up core conservative values nor jettison the image of Ronald Reagan. The idea, which Rush seems to miss, is that we have to take our basic values and apply them to a whole new world of issues that Reagan, God bless him, never had to face as key issues. Society has moved to new issues, in part because Conservatism won several of its fights in the '80 and '90, so we have to take the idea of what it means to be a conservative and apply them to the issues of the day. We cannot just look back at Goldwater and Reagan and sigh wistfully for the old days, we have to take the tools they gave us and move onward to build a conservative ideology worthy of the 21st century.

An Accurate Take On The Current Financial Mess

2008-11-21T09:56:00.000-08:00

This was sent to me by my friend Andrew. Generated lots of painful laughs...

Support In Repealing The Ban On Service

2008-11-17T14:29:00.000-08:00

Here's the teaser:

ANNAPOLIS, Md. – More than 100 retired generals and admirals called Monday for repeal of the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy on gays so they can serve openly, according to a statement obtained by The Associated Press.

You can read the whole article here.

I have two political heroes in my life... my dad (for practical applications of what it means to be a Conservative) and Senator Barry Goldwater (who started what I consider "real Conservatism"). My dad has never made any statements about gays serving in the military but Senator Goldwater did. First, the man known as "Mr. Conservatism" is famously quoted as saying "You don't have to be straight to shoot straight." Nice and pithy, accurate on sentiment but not content. The "quote" comes from his famous 1993 Washington Post editorial:

We have wasted enough precious time, money and talent trying to
persecute and pretend. It's time to stop burying our heads in the sand and
denying reality for the sake of politics. It's time to deal with this
straight on and be done with it. It's time to get on with more important
business.

The conservative movement, to which I subscribe, has as one of its basic
tenets the belief that government should stay out of people's private
lives. Government governs best when it governs least-and stays out of the
impossible task of legislating morality. But legislating someone's version
of morality is exactly what we do by perpetuating discrimination against
gays.

We can take polls. We can visit submarines to get opinions on who are
the best citizens. But that is not the role of a democratic government in a
free society. Under our Constitution, everyone is guaranteed the right to
do as he pleases as long as it does not harm someone else. You don't need to be "straight" to fight and die for your country. You just need to shoot straight.

With all the good this country has accomplished and stood for, I know
that we can rise to the challenge, do the right thing and lift the ban on
gays in the military. Countries with far less leadership and discipline
have traveled this way, and successfully.

When you get down to it, no American able to serve should be allowed, much less given an excuse, not to serve his or her country. We need all our talent.

This is my brand of Conservatism (emphasis on that second paragraph of his). It's time for the rest of the GOP and the rest of the military to catch up.

Lose One, Win One

2008-11-12T08:54:00.001-08:00

Been up 24 hours straight working but I had to acknowledge this. Thanks Connecticut. The east coast is looking more attractive with each passing day.

Singing The Prop 8 Blues

2008-11-10T20:41:00.000-08:00

Well, just in case you've been hiding in the caves with Bin Laden, Prop 8 passed and the people of California have changed the state constitution to enshrine a definition of marriage that removes the rights of same-sex couples to marry. When others were spouting early polls with glee that it was losing I was hesitant to join in. I guess I have been a student of politics too long and had paid attention to what was going on to jump to the conclusion that the proposition would lose. Sadly I was right. The ads promoting Proposition 8 were far too effective on an electorate that was not politically aware. Add to this the way the vote worked (voting for Prop 8 meant gays could no longer marry most likely did work on some... I have anecdotal evidence that this did happen) along with the racial nature of the election (Blacks and Latinos, out in force for Obama, voted heavily for the proposition) spelled a squeeker at best for us. Sadly we didn't even get 50% plus 1, enough to have defeated the proposition.

So what now? There are protests. People are upset and rightfully so, but I hope they are careful in how they proceed. One of the more effective ads was that of the idiot mayor of San Francisco spouting how "whether you like it or not" gay marriage was here to stay. I've heard on the radio and read in news papers of some protests getting ugly, people saying things and doing things that are at worst damaging and at best stupid in trying to get out their anger. But lets understand, this is no long a voting matter... the prop passed, the Constitution as of now will change. The fight, which should continue, now goes to the courts. It falls to the small group of lawyers petitioning the state's supreme court to hear their arguments against the merits of such an amendment. At this time I am not quite sure the courts will decide in their favor but we can continue to hope and pray that is so.

What if this is the case... what if the courts don't come down on our side? Our only real alternative is to put up our own initiative to change the constitution again. Now that will be interesting but given California's silly initiative process it is possible... and we could be in a war of constitutional amendments.

Post Election

2008-11-05T14:22:00.000-08:00

Well, Obama won. I hope he really is a Christian and that he spends time in prayer because he does not have the experience necessary to lead a country like this in times of crisis. Unlike some of the people who were against Obama, I do not think Obama is evil or a "bad man", I simply think he is wrong and that many of his ideas and proposed policies are, in the words of Sarkozy, "immature".

In a related story, Prop 8 passed so no marriage for me despite time, energy, and cash contributed to the cause. Why related? Well, a majority of the people that Obama pulled to the polls voted for Prop 8. All you pro-8/anti-Obama folks needs to send him a big ol' thanks, his people put the prop over the top.

In a perverse addition, Prop 4 failed so no adult notification for abortions on young women. Murder can continue without the counsel and notification of an adult. Just goes to show you the schizophrenia of California... homos get put in their (our) place but murder of the unborn misses this one small potential impediment.

Economically the wonderful people of this state voted even more debt. I have come to the realization that people here simply do not understand the concept of a bond. People, you have to pay for it. It is not free money.

So there you have it. Now the hard work comes...

Crumudgeon Voting

2008-11-04T07:33:00.000-08:00

Well, I voted. I got to my polling place 15 minutes early and was second in line. They reindexed the polling places and mine was moved so I was a little nervous about the state not getting the address right (what, California screwing things up?) but it went fine.

My strategy for voting this year was rather simple:

I couldn't vote for Obama. I simply don't trust him. This man broke his very first promise of taking federal financing to fund his run for office so why should I trust him on anything else?

If you are an incumbent I voted against you. If you are a Democrat incumbent I voted Republican. If you are a Republican incumbent I voted Libertarian. I just want new liars in office, I'm tired of old lies (which is why I voted yes on Prop 11). Hopefully the new liars will be more creative.

On the props, if you directly cost money I voted against you regardless of my actual feelings about the prop. Why? If you ask this you simply are not paying attention to what is happening in this state. WE HAVE NO MONEY!. I'm sorry, but this state is already $14 billion in the red and we just passed the budget less than two months ago. We simply cannot afford to spend more now and it is not right to saddle the young with the thoughtlessness of the old. We have to straighten out the mess before we start piling on more debt.

And of course I voted NO on Proposition 8.

So yes, I voted like a "crusty, ill-tempered, usually older person"... I voted like a crumudgeon, but I felt like it was the appropriate way to vote this election cycle.

Heck, He Gets My Vote Then!

2008-10-31T15:41:00.001-07:00

I'm sorry... this has to be the most simple-minded person ever to be on television. I am getting so sick of politics... between McCain not able to run a campaign to the Obama worshipers I can't stand it any more. Regardless of who wins I get screwed and the real problem is I don't think either candidate is proficient enough to get me to like it.

ENFJ

2008-10-31T13:57:00.001-07:00

Over lunch today I took one of those only personality tests ("Jung Typology Test") and I came out ENFJ: Extraverted Intuitive Feeling Judging. I always try to answer truthfully rather than what I think I should answer or how I think some people might answer for me, so this is accurate for the test. What does it mean? Well according to Wikipedia:

They excel at picking up on the tone of a situation and acting accordingly, adding warmth to a cool setting or turning sour into sweet. They naturally seek to know what people do well, what they enjoy, and where and how they work. They seem to have an infinite number of acquaintances from all walks of life and are always on the lookout for people in need and those who can help out. ENFJs weave and strengthen the collective fabric of social conventions and interactions. Inclusiveness is important and they are particularly sensitive to those who are excluded.

They are natural cheerleaders, often expressing support, gratitude, and encouragement, and heaping praise onto those they appreciate. They take note of what is being done and what needs doing, offering their assistance wherever necessary.

ENFJs enjoy organizing group activities and tend to take their commitments seriously. In general, they are reliable and do not like to disappoint others. As team players and project leaders, they have a gift for rallying their players, focusing on what is being done right and each member's strengths. They are loyal and they expect loyalty. They carry conversations well, finding common ground with their speaker. They tend to find the correct and gracious way to respond in any given situation, no matter how tense or uncomfortable it is.

Here is the more complete description (warning, lengthy):

ENFJs are the benevolent 'pedagogues' of humanity. They have tremendous charisma by which many are drawn into their nurturant tutelage and/or grand schemes. Many ENFJs have tremendous power to manipulate others with their phenomenal interpersonal skills and unique salesmanship. But it's usually not meant as manipulation -- ENFJs generally believe in their dreams, and see themselves as helpers and enablers, which they usually are.

ENFJs are global learners. They see the big picture. The ENFJs focus is expansive. Some can juggle an amazing number of responsibilities or projects simultaneously. Many ENFJs have tremendous entrepreneurial ability.

ENFJs are, by definition, Js, with whom we associate organization and decisiveness. But they don't resemble the SJs or even the NTJs in organization of the environment nor occasional recalcitrance. ENFJs are organized in the arena of interpersonal affairs. Their offices may or may not be cluttered, but their conclusions (reached through feelings) about people and motives are drawn much more quickly and are more resilient than those of their NFP counterparts.

ENFJs know and appreciate people. Like most NFs, (and Feelers in general), they are apt to neglect themselves and their own needs for the needs of others. They have thinner psychological boundaries than most, and are at risk for being hurt or even abused by less sensitive people. ENFJs often take on more of the burdens of others than they can bear.
TRADEMARK: "The first shall be last"

This refers to the open-door policy of ENFJs. One ENFJ colleague always welcomes me into his office regardless of his own circumstances. If another person comes to the door, he allows them to interrupt our conversation with their need. While discussing that need, the phone rings and he stops to answer it. Others drop in with a 'quick question.' I finally get up, go to my office and use the call waiting feature on the telephone. When he hangs up, I have his undivided attention!

Functional Analysis:
Extraverted Feeling

Extraverted Feeling rules the ENFJ's psyche. In the sway of this rational function, these folks are predisposed to closure in matters pertaining to people, and especially on behalf of their beloved. As extraverts, their contacts are wide ranging. Face-to-face relationships are intense, personable and warm, though they may be so infrequently achieved that intimate friendships are rare.
Introverted iNtuition

Like their INFJ cousins, ENFJs are blessed through introverted intuition with clarity of perception in the inner, unconscious world. Dominant Feeling prefers to find the silver lining in even the most beggarly perceptions of those in their expanding circle of friends and, of course, in themselves. In less balanced individuals, such mitigation of the unseemly eventually undermines the ENFJ's integrity and frequently their good name. In healthier individuals, deft use of this awareness of the inner needs and desires of others enables this astute type to win friends, influence people, and avoid compromising entanglements.

The dynamic nature of their intuition moves ENFJs from one project to another with the assurance that the next one will be perfect, or much more nearly so than the last. ENFJs are continually looking for newer and better solutions to benefit their extensive family, staff, or organization.
Extraverted Sensing

Sensing is extraverted. ENFJs can manage details, particularly those necessary to implement the prevailing vision. These data have, however, a magical flexible quality. Something to be bought can be had for a song; the same something is invaluable when it's time to sell. (We are not certain, but we suspect that such is the influence of the primary function.) This wavering of sensory perception is made possible by the weaker and less mature status with which the tertiary is endowed.
Introverted Thinking

Introverted Thinking is least apparent and most enigmatic in this type. In fact, it often appears only when summoned by Feeling. At times only in jest, but in earnest if need be, Thinking entertains as logical only those conclusions which support Feeling's values. Other scenarios can be shown invalid or at best significantly inferior. Such "Thinking in the service of Feeling" has the appearance of logic, but somehow it never quite adds up.

Introverted Thinking is frequently the focus of the spiritual quest of ENFJs. David's lengthiest psalm, 119, pays it homage. "Law," "precept," "commandment," "statute:" these essences of inner thinking are the mysteries of Deity for which this great Feeler's soul searched.
Famous ENFJs:

David, King of Israel
U.S. Presidents:
Abraham Lincoln
Ronald Reagan

William Cullen Bryant, poet
Abraham Maslow, psychologist and proponent of self-actualization
Ross Perot
Sean Connery
Elizabeth Dole
Francois Mitterand
Dick Van Dyke
Andy Griffith
James Garner
William Aramony, former president of United Way
Gene Hackman (Superman, Antz)
Dennis Hopper (Speed)
Brenda Vaccaro
Craig T. Nelson (Coach)
Diane Sawyer (Good Morning America)
Randy Quaid (Bye Bye, Love; Independence Day)
Tommy Lee Jones (The Fugitive)
Kirstie Alley ("Cheers," Look Who's Talking movies)
Michael Jordan, NBA basketball player
Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean)
Oprah Winfrey
Bob Saget America's Funniest Home Videos, Full House
Julia Louis-Dreyfus ("Seinfeld")
Ben Stiller (The Royal Tenenbaums)
Peyton Manning, Indianapolis Colts quarterback
Matthew McConaughey (The Wedding Planner)
Pete Sampras, Tennis Champion
Lauren Graham ("Gilmore Girls")
Ben Affleck (The Sum Of All Fears)
John Cusack (High Fidelity)

Home

2008-10-28T20:11:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the recent neglect of the site but even with all the easy targets our recent political and financial environments have provided my heart just hasn't been in it. As some of you know, my father's health has been in rapid decline and that has occupied my thoughts. The problems became such that I made a trip "home" to see him and the family. It was my first trip in a little over three years and I have to say the trip did me a bit of good in that it reinforced in me the idea of what it means to have a home... not a house, but a home.

It is at home where I am loved, unconditionally. Home is that one port in the storms of life where I know I will always be welcome, made to feel safe, made warm, be fed, listened to, cried with and laughed with. Home is where it isn't Mike the success, Mike the intellectual, Mike the "pillar of society" or anything other than "Mike the son", "Mike the brother", and "Mike the uncle" that holds any weight and has any standing. Home is where people are waiting out in the cold mist just to hug me and say "Welcome home, we're happy to see you" and where those same people with mist in their eyes hold me tight as I leave and say "We love you. Be safe. Be happy. Come home more often" and I know in the depths of your soul they mean it.

Home is the place that laid the foundations of all that I was, all that I am, and all that I will be. Home is where not necessarily everything went over well, but was always done in the spirit of love and desire of helping me to become better. Sometimes those lessons worked, sometimes they didn't, but even when I said "No" and openly rebelled home is where I can always return without heaps of shame thrown on me.

Home is where I learned the lessons of celebrating life and the cold reality of death, of the value of spiritual riches in the absense of material riches, of the importance of the small things in a big ol' world.

Home is where I learned the power of love in the face of evil and hatred which has given me a generally optimistic view of life (after all, the end of Scripture can be summarized as "Good wins"). Home isn't the place of perfection but it is the place of freedom to try and the freedom to fail. Home is where I learned to be human and was privileged to see the true heights to which humanity can rise in the face of adversity. Home is also where I learned the following poem by Edgar Guest from my great grandfather, my grandmother, and my mother:

It takes a heap o' livin' in a house t' make it home,
A heap o' sun an' shadder, an' ye sometimes have t' roam
Afore ye really 'preciate the things ye lef' behind,
An' hunger fer 'em somehow, with 'em allus on yer mind.
It don't make any differunce how rich ye get t' be,
How much yer chairs an' tables cost, how great yer luxury;
It ain't home t' ye, though it be the palace of a king,
Until somehow yer soul is sort o' wrapped round everything.

Home ain't a place that gold can buy or get up in a minute;
Afore it's home there's got t' be a heap o' livin' in it;
Within the walls there's got t' be some babies born, and then
Right there ye've got t' bring 'em up t' women good, an' men;
And gradjerly as time goes on, ye find ye wouldn't part
With anything they ever used—they've grown into yer heart:
The old high chairs, the playthings, too, the little shoes they wore
Ye hoard; an' if ye could ye'd keep the thumb-marks on the door.

Ye've got t' weep t' make it home, ye've got t' sit an' sigh
An' watch beside a loved one's bed, an' know that Death is nigh;
An' in the stillness o' the night t' see Death's angel come,
An' close the eyes o' her that smiled, an' leave her sweet voice dumb.
Fer these are scenes that grip the heart, an'when yer tears are dried,
Ye find the home is dearer than it was, an' sanctified;
An' tuggin' at ye always are the pleasant memories
O' her that was an' is no more—ye can't escape from these.

Ye've got t' sing an' dance fer years, ye've got t' romp an' play,
An' learn t' love the things ye have by usin' 'em each day;
Even the roses 'round the porch must blossom year by year
Afore they 'come a part o' ye, suggestin' someone dear
Who used t' love 'em long ago, an' trained 'em jes t' run
The way they do, so's they would get the early mornin' sun;
Ye've got t' love each brick an' stone from cellar up t' dome:
It takes a heap o' livin' in a house t' make it home.

Having gone "back home" and been reminded of "home" I have come to realize that "home" has expanded. "Home" is back in Missouri, but given all that I have said "home" is, I see it shaping here in California too for I see my beau as part of home as well... and I am the richer for it.

Two Quotes

2008-10-22T13:27:00.000-07:00

One long, one short, both by J. R. R. Tolkien:

We have come from God, and inevitably the myths woven by us, though they contain error, will also reflect a splintered fragment of the true light, the eternal truth that is with God. Indeed, only by myth-making, only by becoming a 'sub-creator' and inventing stories, can Man aspire to the state of perfection that he knew before the Fall. Our myths may be misguided, but they steer however shakily towards the true harbor, while materialistic "progress" leads only to a yawning abyss and the Iron Crown of the power of evil.

And one that is perhaps more potent...

...the power of Evil in the world is not finally resistible by incarnate creatures, however "good"; and the Writer of the Story is not one of us.

Fairly Quiet Oktoberfest

2008-10-13T10:10:00.001-07:00

Well, it didn't turn out like I had planned, but sometimes it is good to throw the plan away and just go with the flow. I had intended to have a group over to the house for a wine tasting and then go to Oktoberfest in OB. Sent out an invitation, saw that most people did actually view the invitation but for some strange reason most didn't even bother to reply to the RSVP. It's really frustrating and a total lack of courtesy and consideration, something that bothers me more than most things these days about how people are out here. I mean, I wouldn't have minded had people just said "No, have other plans" or if they said "Yes" but called to give their regrets about not coming (which I had to do on Sunday because I was on call and had problems to deal with during an event my beau and I were attend)... at least that is information. No news though it hard to work with.

So while the group was small we still had fun. The grill was flaring, wine was flowing and we just enjoyed sitting outside in the autumnal sun enjoying life. Our friend Sarah came over towards the end of the wine time and we all headed to the OB Pier area for Oktoberfest to find... a bunch of drunk straight people. Now that's not necessarily a bad thing but the limit on the size of the venue made the concentration a little tough to handle so after a quick beer we went over to The Vine for dinner and some more fellowship. It was quite fun and I got to build up some positive energy for the trip home.

Hugs to you who were there and thank you.

With Supporters Like This...

2008-10-09T13:58:00.001-07:00

So Obama is the Messiah? When I see him walk on water and return from the dead after three days then I might believe...

Comforting Angels

2008-10-08T14:05:00.000-07:00

People talk a lot about guardian angels. I am lucky to have two special angels in my life right now. Given all the problems happening in my family it would be hard to carry on with my day-to-day work. I don't sleep well, my mind is filled with worry but I honestly believe that these two are in my life for a reason.

First I have Romeo. OK, go ahead and laugh, but Romeo just appeared in my life when I was going through some rough times and now, over nine years later he's still here. When I first heard about my father Romeo seemed to go into a comforting mode... when I am here by myself he hops up into bed and curls up near my pillow. When I am laying down he always comes and lays next to me. He follows me around and is always watching out for me (ok, sometimes it is because he wants food but not ALL the time). Just having someone in the house makes it much easier to come home these days.

The other is my beau. I needed someone in my life with a big heart and now I have someone who has chosen to be with me regardless of my faults and frailties. He always lets me know he loves me and cares for me but more importantly he backs up his words with his actions. Even though we don't live together he tells me every morning he loves me and every night he lets me know that he is there.

So, there you go. For all the crap that is happening, God makes his presence known through my two angels. I don't know how I would cope without them.

Obama Supports Iraq Invasion?

2008-10-07T20:15:00.000-07:00

Given that the "Obama Doctrine" as espoused in the second debate is based on morality (apparently even over national interest), I think that the pre-invasion situation in Iraq would warrant us going in to liberate an oppressed people. Thanks for the support Obama! I suppose that means if Obama is elected president we go next to what is probably the longest running conflict in modern history, Sri Lanka, followed by sending troops into Zimbabwe to oust that blight on humanity Robert Mugabe.

Hawaii

2008-09-29T21:05:00.000-07:00

Market tanks, dumb and dumber running for the top office in the country, family medical problems... can't take it right now so I thought I would post something to lighten the mood (well, my mood anyway).

The first hotel, Ala Moana. BEAUTIFUL property. Our room was an ocean view on the 28th floor:

It was wonderful... my beau literally took me. I didn't pay for air, hotel, sights... first time in my adult life this happened and he hit a home run (and raised the bar for my turn).

One of the first places he took me was someplace I always wanted to see, the USS Arizona Memorial:

Our activites included climbing Diamond Head (even have a certificate to prove it * grin *). This is a shot from the top of the mount looking back towards the hotel area:

We changed hotels to the Waikiki Grand Hotel literally across the street from the beach. This was a cool little hotel, recently remodeled and we got a nice little suite with again an ocean view. Here is the view from across the street from the hotel:

This place was really the "surfer side" of the hotel strip:

After the move we spent a day at the north shore. Here I am during our hike of Waimea Valley Park headed to the water fall:

Then there was the day we spent snorkling and relaxing at Hanauma Bay. This is a pick from the trail leading down to the beach area:

The time with my beau was magical, near perfect and far too short. But God willing we'll back back.

Aloha!

Obama Is Just Another Politician

2008-09-23T18:45:00.000-07:00

I am still amazed at the people who seem to view Senator Obama as the second coming of the Messiah (though at the Democratic National Convention he looked more like Apollo with that silly backdrop). With all the financial mess going on what does Obama do? He distorts McCain's record and McCain's words on the matter. Since he has little to no record of his own to tout he twists what McCain says to try to make himself look better and play off the fears of the masses. On a recent speech (the one thing that Obama has proven capable of doing) in New Mexico he says of McCain:

He has consistently opposed the sorts of common-sense regulations that might have lessened the current crisis. When I was warning about the danger ahead on Wall Street months ago because of the lack of oversight, Senator McCain was telling the Wall Street Journal — and I quote — 'I'm always for less regulation.'

What McCain actually said was:

I'm always for less regulation. But I am aware of the view that there is a need for government oversight. I think we found this in the subprime lending crisis — that there are people that game the system and if not outright broke the law, they certainly engaged in unethical conduct which made this problem worse. So I do believe that there is role for oversight... I'd like to see a lot of the unnecessary government regulations eliminated, not just a moratorium.

Compare the two... Obama comes off like a typical, old-time, slandering, word-twisting politician (which he is). Now McCain's people aren't really any better when it comes to Obama's words or record (what there is of it), but McCain's isn't setting himself up like Obama. When it comes to the two, Obama was the one who set himself up to the higher standard... and he is the one who falls hardest into the mud.

Speaking in Florida, Obama the fearmonger also said that the drop the market experienced recently would have affected the retirement benefits of today's retirees. Absolute nonsense. The private account plan suggested by President Bush and backed by McCain would not have applied to anyone born before 1950 which, if my math is right, wouldn't even touch those taking early retirement at age 62 this year! Let's ignore the fact that the entire thing is voluntary, Obama is just flat out lying about its impact to the good folks in Florida.

Again, this does not sound like a new type of politician. I'm almost as old as Obama and it sounds like the same type of crap I hear every four years so I am curious just why Obama thinks he is different.

Back in San Diego

2008-09-21T22:10:00.000-07:00

Just a brief note to say we're back. Once I have rested up I'll give you the skinny on the trip.

Hawaii - First Full Day

2008-09-16T10:51:00.000-07:00

Agenda:

Visit Pearl Harbor Memorial

Hike Diamond Head

Spend time on Waikiki Beach

Continue search for best Mai Tai in Hawaii

Details to come later...

Another "Funny But True" Cartoon

2008-09-11T10:05:00.001-07:00

Taking My Father's Advice

2008-09-06T20:39:00.001-07:00

When it comes to politics I tend to think like my father... that lawyers should not be allowed into politics. I find it interesting that the top of the Democrat ticket has two lawyers and the top of the Republican ticket has no lawyers. Hmmmm...

Mayor Versus Community Organizer

2008-09-06T19:36:00.000-07:00

So much has been made about Governor Palin's jib at Obama's experience that I thought I would take a few moments to address it. Just for the record, she said the following in her acceptance speech:

"I guess a small-town mayor is sort of like a community organizer, except that you have actual responsibilities."

I have a few questions about the left's reaction to the statement:

First, what is wrong with it? As a mayor you do have stated, defined responsibilities in your city charter. You have a constituency that put you there, people have real needs that they expect you as the figurehead of local government to do something about their problems, keep the city safe, etc. What about a community organizer? Obama doesn't really tell us much about it other than the fact that he was one. What he does tell us is the following:

Despite some meaningful victories, the work of Obama--and hundreds of other organizers--did not transform the South Side or restore lost industries. But it did change the young man who became the junior senator from Illinois in 2004, and it provides clues to his worldview as he bids for the Democratic presidential nomination.

"I can't say we didn't make mistakes, that I knew what I was doing," Obama recalled three years ago to a boisterous convention of the still-active DCP. "Sometimes I called a meeting, and nobody showed up. Sometimes preachers said, 'Why should I listen to you?' Sometimes we tried to hold politicians accountable, and they didn't show up. I couldn't tell whether I got more out of it than this neighborhood."

This quote can be found in an Obama-friendly article from The Nation. Not much else seems to be found out about his community organizer works other than the fact that Obama comes from the Saul Alinksky school of community and labor organization. If you have read his "Rules For Radicals" book and have any knowledge of how community organizers often (though admittedly not always) worked you wouldn't find much to quibble with over Giuliani's statement either.

Being a community organizer is nothing to be ashamed of and rallying people to a common cause and purpose can be a great thing to accomplish in one's life, but I still don't understand why people were upset at Palin's comparison.

Second, the Democrats seems to say that McCain's call for people to community service as a contradiction to what they heard from Palin and Giuliani. Well, if you are honest and look at the list of things McCain said about becoming involved in your community (be a teacher, a fireman, a minister, a nurse or doctor, etc) there are differences. Just stop and think about what a community organizer does and what the duties (often defined and measured) of those jobs are. They are not gender specific, they are not race specific, they are not politically inclined, they are hired often for defined skill sets, they have to meet goals and requirements (usually). How does that compare with the activities of a "community organizer"? And let us not overlook the fact that Palin herself can be considered a "community organizer" as she was head of the local PTA. I haven't heard much of that time from her, but I wonder if her activities as a "community organizer" were more successful that Obama's self-admitted mixed record was, which leads me to my next question...

Third, OK, so she was the mayor of a small town and he was a "community organizer". I don't really care so much as to what they did but more interested in who was effective at doing their job. Obama's own words in the Nation article seem to indicate mixed results at best and we don't have any firm details on what he accomplished. Even the New York Times (in a mixed review of Palin's Mayoral tenure) stated:

In Wasilla, Ms. Palin is widely praised for following through on campaign promises by cutting property taxes while improving roads and sewers and strengthening the Police Department... She is largely viewed as having had her hometown’s best interests at heart when she pursued big projects or an overhaul of city taxes. By the time she ran for re-election in 1999 — again facing Mr. Stein — things had smoothed out. She was returned to office by a large margin, 826 votes to 255.

Granted there were headaches, many of them caused by the fact that she ran against the "old boys'" network and some of the due to her heartfelt conservatism and even a few I would question, but overall she seemed to accomplish what she set out to do and the overall view of her in her town seems to be quite positive.

So again I don't understand the problem, but even Obama seems to take this as a thorn in his side. In a recent interview with Anderson Cooper Obama still seems to consider her only experience as that of a mayor:

“My understanding is that Gov. Palin’s town, Wassilla, has I think 50 employees. We've got 2500 in this campaign. I think their budget is maybe 12 million dollars a year – we have a budget of about three times that just for the month,” Obama responded.

What is missing in this response is that Cooper asked about her experience as Governor of Alaska and mayor of Wasilla. I find it rather interesting that Obama ignores her being governor. He mentions bills he sponsored for New Orleans post-Katrina but if you search the actual record you find two he sponsored, four he co-sponsored with about a 50% success rate of passing. Not the greatest of accomplishments but he can be credited with trying, but for someone who claims the ability to work in a bipartisan manner this is not the greatest track record. He seems to be trying to compare every facet of his political career with that of Palin's time as mayor. What was his budget and staff during his "community organizer" years since that is the latest comparison with the second on the GOP ticket?

Honestly, I think Obama and Biden need to tread very carefully here. Palin may not have a fat resume but she does have some very strong positive accomplishments. Also Obama is so focused on Palin that he is leaving himself open to McCain. As former President Bill Clinton asked... suppose you have two candidates, one whom you only agree with half the time but they can deliver on those things and one you agree with all the time but you don't think they can deliver on any of them... whom would you vote for? But of course, he wasn't talking about this :-)

McCain Ad Foreshadows My Next Post

2008-09-03T20:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry, been busy the last couple of days with work, homework, and taking my next wine certification exam so nothing remotely original at this point, but this ad gives you a thumbnail sketch of what I will be writing about in the next couple of posts.

Not Laboring On Labor Day

2008-09-02T09:20:00.000-07:00

What started out not so great turned out to be a fine weekend. Though my beau and I were separated in the early part, we were able to spend Sunday and Monday together. Sunday we met with our friend Sarah and headed to the Del Mar Racetrack (Sarah had purchased tickets through the UC-San Diego Retirement Association) and we spent about 4 hours having fun losing money (seems that we had to balance last year's winnings, but since none of us are big betters the losses were small). It was fun just spending time with a friend and getting caught up on life's events. We continued the camaraderie by heading to dinner and sharing more talks and laughs over pasta and Chianti. Monday was slow and lazy... sleep in late (almost 8 AM!), walk down to Shade's for breakfast, take in an early movie, and just be together. Spending such time with the one you love makes the reality of having to part all the more difficult, yet it fires the anticipation of our next time together.

Excellent Summary Of The Story Thus Far

2008-08-29T14:11:00.000-07:00

I think Ed Rollins did a fantastic job with this commentary on the tickets of the two main political parties. Enjoy.

McCain's Pick

2008-08-29T10:20:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a premonition... McCain was going to pick Sarah Palin as his running mate. After watching Obama's speech I kept going over the short list of possible VP candidates and why * I * wouldn't pick them (Romney, somewhat negative against McCain in the primaries and has the wealth issue that voters seem to be against; Huckabee, no, no, no preachers and honestly a bit of a rube; Giuliani, main issue is defense and that is McCain's forte; Ridge, too pro-choice and would alienate "God's Own Party", etc, etc, etc). Then I got to Palin. Young woman, mother (married her high school sweetheart), solidly pro-life, strong conservative credentials, solid blue-collar credentials, former sports journalist, administrator with a background of reform. Only real negatives: some will see her as a "pander pick" and she is a first term governor (before that was a mayor for two terms). The question to me was can she be presented in such a way as to blunt these criticism (which the McCain campaign has leveled in one form or another at Obama)? I think it is possible but they have to be careful.

Yes, she is a woman (and an attractive one at that) but I don't think McCain will be hurt by that as much as some have stated. This isn't Geraldine Ferraro again. Palin is tough with a strong (if limited but longer than Obama's) track record of reform. She seems to be a principled conservative rather than a politically expedient one. My one big issue with her (but will play well with the "God's Own Party" crowd) is on gay rights but right now I think there are bigger fish to fry and I am willing to step back on this at the moment.

The Democrats seem to be salivating at the "experience" issue. Before they do, let's be honest... all three (McCain, Palin, and Biden) have more experience than Obama and of the four only Palin has ever run anything (and from all accounts somewhat successfully at that). Her apparent weakness seems to be foreign policy (as is Obama's) but McCain is at the top of the ticket and it will be his advisors that will be helping shape foreign policy not hers. What she brings to the table that neither Obama nor Biden has is the fact that she has been a governor and a reform-minded governor at that. She has had to deal directly with budgets, hiring and firing people, and being the only target when people are not happy (at least in the Senate you aren't the only pig... you've got 99 other porkers there with you). In fact, again if you're an honest political geek and look at accomplishments and not rhetoric, you will see that when it comes to reform and bucking political establishments that the McCain/Palin ticket is the real reform-oriented ticket.

So is she bullet-proof? No, but in politics no one is (not even the "anointed one"). Do I think she can do the job? Yes, at least as well as the man at the top of the Democrat ticket.

McCain/Palin 2008!

Open Plea to John McCain

2008-08-26T15:24:00.001-07:00

PLEASE, OH PLEASE, OH PLEASE Senator McCain pick someone with some administrative skills for your running mate. The thoughts of an all legislative race fills me with terrible dread. Pick someone who has actually lead and done something creative and meaningful with their time on this planet. Obama blew his choice, please do not make the same mistake.

XOXOXO

Michael

Obama's "Dick Cheney" Pick

2008-08-25T07:08:00.000-07:00

If you can, think back to the 2000 election cycle when it was time for the Republican nominee-elect, George Bush, to select a running mate. The minute the choice was announced, the clearly anti-Bush media started saying that Cheney added gravitas to the supposedly weak top of the ticket. Given that whether or not you like him (and you know that I am no fan of Dubbya) Bush was running as a relatively successful governor of a very large state (he was well into his second term after having won with 69% of the vote) while Obama has been in charge of... nothing. So if Bush needed gravitas it is easy to see that Obama needs it in abundance. But whereas Cheney has done something outside of government, what is the Democrat's ticket heavyweight record? Ummmm... nothing really. He was admitted to the bar in 1968 and elected to the New Castle County, County Council in 1970 and after serving a whole two years ran for the Senate at the seasoned age of 29. He won and has been in the Senate since. THIS is the guy who is supposed to mollify the ticket's elitist image and to be the blue-collar face to the American people? And as for added gravitas, the one thing Biden brings to the table is weight, the weight of 35 years of Senate votes and two horribly failed Presidential runs in his own right. So Cheney brought "gravitas" to the ticket... what does Biden bring?

Age and perceived experience (even though being a Senator lends very little to any type of administrative experience which is the branch of government covering the Presidency), maybe a run for the AARP vote to offset McCain's advantage? If nothing else it provides a wonderful contrast showing the weakness of the top of the ticket.

Wonderful quotes about Obama that the McCain campaign can tie into those of Hillary Clinton... so let me take a moment to thank both of them. Just think of the money you saved the Republicans for writing the ads for us.

He's Catholic and it is well known that Obama is extremely weak among Catholic voters, so maybe a plus but I don't think so.

Deliver Delaware to Obama. Um, don't think that is a problem for "The One".

Poise and eloquence in getting the message out? Well, perhaps if he plagiarize someone else's writings (see is 1988 campaign for the top of the ticket), but remember this is the guy who called Obama "clean" and said you can't go into a 7-Eleven without an Indian accent.

Attack-dog capabilities, the one job he may be qualified for.

The problem the Democrats face are now two-fold... Obama is a young lightweight, Biden appears to be bit of an old lightweight who in a 35 year track has accomplished few major legislative wins.

We now have three Senators at the top of the two tickets... I'm even more curious now to see who McCain picks. In many ways I am starting to pull for Romney (bit of a shock for me) because SOMEONE has to have experience in running something. Obama blew his chance, will McCain do the same?

Charity Wine Tasting For Momma's Kitchen

2008-08-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

Last night my beau and I attended a charity wine tasting for Momma's Kitchen, a local organization that prepares and delivers food for people with HIV or other critical illnesses at no charge (a very worthy cause in my opinion). We arrived there at 7, just missing the whites being served but we did get a glass of sparkling wine before sampling the reds and diving into the finger food supplied by some of the better local restaurants (including one of my favorites, Bite). From what I could tell all of the wines were from one producer, Alice White. If you want to read my review of the wine check out my other site under a posting of the same name.

The event appeared to be a success with the bulk of the crowd staying the entire time allotted. We are now looking into ways we can further support this organization.

A Year And A Day

2008-08-19T10:20:00.000-07:00

According to Wikipedia a year and a day has noted:

The period of a year and a day was a convenient period to represent a significant amount of time. Its use was generally as a jubilee or a permanence.

Historically (England) the period that a couple must be married for a spouse to have claim to a share of inheritable property.

In mediaeval (sic) Europe, a runaway serf became free after a year and a day.

When a judgement (sic) has been reversed a fresh action may lodged within a year and a day, regardless of the statute of limitations. U.S.

Today I add one more item because today marks a year and day since I met my beau. I think this fall under the first bullet point. Last night we celebrated by doing all of the things we did on our first date. As he said last night... now we can start counting in years. :-)

What Russia Wants (In One Cartoon)

2008-08-17T21:18:00.000-07:00

Putin is on record stating that the worst event of the 20th century was the breakup of the old Soviet Union. The traditional method of the old Soviet Union in dealing with their opponents was either take them out or break them then take them. Putin is showing such tactics again with his desire to get rid of Mikheil Saakashvili, a Western educated and pro-west ally and replace him with someone more amenable. Russia's moves against Estonia and more recently Georgia (be honest, Russia has gearing up for this, mounting troops at the border for over a year) and hints at Ukraine desires have shown Putin's true colors. Unfortunately what we actually can do is limited. Estonia is a recent member of both NATO and the European Union which provides some cover, but there are other former Soviet satellites out that that should be afforded some support. Russian officials have been quoted as saying that Moscow sees no "rational arguments that this expansion [of either NATO nor the European Union] will aid the security interests of these states". Personally, I see with what just happened in the case of Georgia it just have done so.

Russia and Prophecy

2008-08-11T20:21:00.000-07:00

My background (and current status) in the Christian realm is that of "dispensationalist". As such, I take a pretty danged literal interpretation of Biblical prophecy (as well as following a literal, but not wooden, heurmeneutics). One of the more interesting areas has been that of the prophetic books of the Bible, particularly the final war against Israel as announced in Ezekiel chapters 38 and 39 (read here). For several years Gog and Magog have been associated with Russian but after the brave stance of Ronald Reagan (pardon me while I stand) helping bring about the "end" of the Soviet Union people started to poo-poo this idea. What a difference a generation makes (given that a Biblical generation is about 20 years this is pretty much right). Now Russia is again rich, arrogant, and on the move. Witness the attacks against the former Soviet state of Georgia. It is no secret that Vladamir Putin thinks that the dissolution of the old Soviet Union was the worst thing to have happen and if you look closely it is possible to see the beginning of the reunification of the USSR of old. Europe is ineffective to trying to stem the tide and if Georgia falls is even more at the mercy of Russia as its main conduit of petroleum would come back completely under Russian control. If you are a Christian I ask you to pray for the people of both Russian and Georgia. Pray for the leaders of Georgia as they make a stand as one of the few democracies who sides with the United States. If you are not, I ask you to do a search on past statements of Putin and see if you can discern what his intentions might be.

More Vorlon Management

2008-07-28T19:59:00.000-07:00

During our week of leadership training I was introduced to the idea of finding one's True North and in my reading of Bill George's wonderful book True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership I have started a "deep dive" into the topics we skimmed in class. One of the techniques to find your True North is that of using a life time-line to tell your story, to view the events that shaped you and motivate you. We did a shortened version of this in class but I have been working on a longer one and have hit upon something that I recognize as a source of my desire to lead (part of my answer to the Vorlon question of "Who am I?"). My vision of leadership is to provide an environment where people are free to work, to remove obstacles to their ability to work as they best can. Using the technique I saw some things that showed me where at least in part this passion comes from and why for me leadership is a moral issue and not simply a matter for business.

When I was growing up my parents ran several very small businesses in an extremely poor part of the country (hence we were poor too, just a little different level of poor). They constantly had to battle the government with its nit-picky rules just to survive, often feeling frustrated over having to invest what was for us large amounts of our meager funds just to stay up to code even on things that really were not important to our businesses. When they would turn to their elected government officials for help they were far more often than not turned away. I can recall many times when just trying to comply kept us on the edge of going under financially and my folks would take outsides jobs from time-to-time just to stay afloat because it seemed no one was on their side who had any authority to help. Yet, through all of that, I also saw my parents go far out of their way to help those even less fortunate. My mother spent many hours filling out state and federal papers for our customers who were functionally illiterate just so they could get the assistance that was due them according to the existing laws and statutes (interesting for a bunch of Republicans, eh?). My dad would help pitch in when local millers and farmers had problems. When other people came on hard times their past-due notes to us suddenly became not so past due. These events helped shape my view of leadership, the view that people who lead are also servants, ready to help those around then.

This is part of my life story, part of my attempt to answer the Vorlon question and hopefully become a stronger leader.

Randy Pausch - Rest In Peach

2008-07-25T09:25:00.000-07:00

Obit

"We don't beat the reaper by living longer, we beat the reaper by living well and living fully,"
- Randy Pausch

Truth (Again) From Steve Breen

2008-07-23T12:49:00.000-07:00

Vorlon Leadership

2008-07-21T20:28:00.001-07:00

I was honored by being selected as one of a small number employees identified as having the potential to become a true leader within my company and last week was sent to a leadership intensive held at company HQ. One of the early focal points was the concept of authentic leadership whose central idea is that of self-awareness. After a brief introduction to the concept I raised my hand and said "So you're siding with the Vorlons?" Dead silence in the room. I then explained that the main arc from a sci-fi series named Babylon 5 was a war of philosophy between (essentially) the Vorlons and the Shadows. Glossing over a lot of detail, the Vorlons believed the prime question a being should answer is "Who are you?" while the Shadows focused on that of "What do you want?" Authentic leadership has at its core (like the Vorlons) the idea that to be a leader you have to first understand yourself, your own principles, your motivations, your values, before you can become a credible leader. I happen to agree. This is not to negate the Shadow question, but without answering the Vorlon question first trying to answer the Shadow question leads to disharmony and discordant requests that will only confuse those who answer to you. In short, I spent last week learning I am a Vorlon... now if I can just glow in the dark and fly :-)

Oh Those Jibjab Boys...

2008-07-20T18:29:00.000-07:00

Two-Way Biological Metacrisis (Dr. Who Spoilers)

2008-07-10T12:09:00.000-07:00

*** SPOILER ALERT ***

OK, I have to say, for all the holes in them the last two episodes of Doctor Who Series 4 (The Stolen Earth and Journey's End) were great to watch... action filled, good special effects (for the BBC), nice writing, conclusion of a large story arc, and very bittersweet. I will miss Catherine Tate as companion Donna Noble. So far of all of the new companions Donna truly represented the "everyman" (or "everyperson") literary character. Donna began as a vacuous, loud, somewhat lazy, somewhat obnoxious person (why, almost American) who becomes the tether to The Doctor's high-flying antics. Donna is the companion who speaks for the viewer, who in the face of The Doctor's "we can't meddle about with time" tells The Doctor that they must do something, that just because they can't save everyone they can at least save someone (see for example the episode The Fires of Pompeii). Like many of us, Donna doesn't see herself as special, doesn't think she has anything of value to contribute, scream out at the universe because she thinks no one will listen to her. And yet, the "best temp in Chiswick", grounded in everyday human experience, shows her worth. Donna like many of us fall prey to what the existentialists warned against... defining yourself by what you do. People think of themselves as important based on what they do, their job, their standing in a community, how other perceive them. In truth that is not what makes you special. You are special because, simply, you are. You should not define yourself simply as the things you do, yet when you meet someone new isn't the first question (certainly one of the first three) "What do you do?" A better question might be to ask "Who are you?" If you are a sci-fi fan as I am you will see this as a twist on the Shadow question ("What do you want?") as opposed to the Vorlon question ("Who are you?") from Babylon 5 (there are actually four questions eventually asked. I'll save the other two for a future post).

At the finale of Journey's End Donna learns that she really is unique, that it is her "human-ness" that takes her even beyond what The Doctor is capable of... not because she was a scientist, a political leader, or even because she was "the best temp in Chiswick", but because she was human.

Donna is gone from the show and I will miss her. Let's hope that the next companion can retain some that good "everyman" character that she injected into the show.

Good job Catherine, thanks.

Is this thing on?

2008-07-09T21:35:00.000-07:00

What is it with public figures and microphones? They think the things are off, the figures make jackass statements, then get all apologetic when they are caught. Latest case, Jesse Jackson saying just before going on air that he thinks Obama talks down to black people and (apparently) he wants to cut Obama's n*ts off. OK, if those are his honest thoughts (motivated by jealousy perhaps) so be it. What is funny is how once he finds out the remarks were captured he "apologized" (you can listen to the rambling mess here). If you go there listen closely to statements like "If I have offended" and "live mic". First off, sounds a bit like his statements were meant to be taken as they were given and if it bothers you Jesse is sorry and second what he is most sorry about is that he said them into an open microphone. Jesse also loses points in the common sense game for saying them on a Fox set. I mean, how stupid can one get?

It's sad that our so-called leaders apologize when they get caught. Hey boys and girls (I would say "men and women" but that would be elevating them too much), you know how to keep out of trouble like this? DON'T say things in private that you wouldn't say in public.

The Women In My Family...

2008-07-08T20:57:00.000-07:00

When I saw this I thought how fortunate I was to have a mother and two grandmothers like this:

New McCain Ad - Awesome

2008-07-08T20:37:00.000-07:00

Don't hope for a better life, vote for one. This really struck me. I keep hearing "change" and "hope" from the Obama people but still have no clear idea on what he will do differently than any typical liberal. So far for an economic plan all I hear is "spend money on more programs". Now some prudent spending may be necessary, but there is really very little that I hear that will stimulate the economy to create new jobs. In truth the only "change" I hear is that government must be bigger, must have more control of the lives of the citizens. That isn't they type of change I want.

Blog Splitting

2008-07-07T20:41:00.000-07:00

Well, I have finally decided to start another blog on a special topic that I have come to appreciate over the years. I will continue writing on this blog talking about politics, technology, culture, etc. so don't go away. What I have decided to do is write more on wine. Yes, there are hundreds if not thousands of blogs out there talking about wine but this one will be different, it will be mine. This blog will not be written from the view point of a professional wine person or of someone to whom money is no object or to play the part of "wine snob" and try to show off what (little) I know about wine. This will truly be the work of an amateur, someone who does something because they like it.

Catching Up

2008-07-06T18:42:00.000-07:00

It seems like it has been a while since I posted on here so this is an attempt to catch up on the personal side. First, Mr. Beau and I took a little trip up to the Santa Barbara area for some wine tasting. This was in part to just get out of town for a couple of days and in part to provide a wide selection of wines for Mr. Beau to taste and help me gauge where his wine preferences lay. Over a three-day weekend we traveled to and tasted wines at the following wonderful wineries:

Brander Winery (excellent all around offerings)

Gainey Winery (very good wines, nice chardonnays this year)

Kalyra Winery (a fun winery with some excellent lighter and dessert wines)

Beckman winery (top-notch Syrahs and and tasty Grenache... and the hottest pourers)

Bridlewood Winery (they seem to have come up a notch in their offerings since the Gallo buy-out)

Firestone winery (Good wines, nice Riesling)

Fess Parker Winery (Davy Crockett knows his wines, but watch the alcohol content on the new Syrahs)

Curtis Winery (wonderful Rhone-style wines)

Zaca Mesa Winery (a new one for me, great offering, don't pass up the Z Cuvée or the Z Three from them)

We dined at the consistently great Hitching Post and discovered another fantastic place to dine at the local casino Willows.

As usual the trip was too short but it was relaxing and wonderful to get away from "the real world" for a couple of days.

For the Fourth we spent a lot of time together taking turns taking care of each other. On the Fourth we went to the San Diego Zoo, saw a movie, took a walk along the beach talking about what the day meant to us (and how we both tend to say "Independence Day" instead of "Fourth of July" when mentioning the holiday), had dinner at a local cantina and sat on the beach while watching one of the best fireworks presentations I can remember. On Saturday we used my San Diego Art Museum membership and took our friend Sarah to "get some culture" and then spent time relaxing at The Prado having appetizers and drinks and enjoying each person's company. I can think of very few ways of passing time than just being with friends and loved ones and I hope that you had the same privilege this weekend.

Classification

2008-06-25T08:56:00.001-07:00

Of course the questions were loaded, multipart and philosophically flawed but what do you expect from a simple online quiz? Personally, I am not much surprised at the results as in many ways I am quite difficult to pin down with simple labels.

Your Political Profile:

Overall: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Social Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal

Ethics: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal

How Liberal Or Conservative Are You?

Dobson, Obama and "The Speech"

2008-06-24T19:12:00.000-07:00

Funny how today we hear James Dobson, a man with whom on many issues I agree, attack Senator Obama on a speech he made two years ago at the liberal Christian conference Call to Renewal. In reading the text of this speech I bristled at the comments Dobson made about Senator Obama and his exegetical prowess. Now don't get me wrong, if the Senator and I were to sit down and "talk Bible" I would probably disagree with him on quite a bit, but with regards to this speech there wasn't much I had trouble with.

Obama makes some good points (which obviously are those I agree with *snicker*). In fact, most of what I disagree with is not so much his interpretation but rather his typical liberal way of thinking. I agree with much of what Obama says on the role of personal religion in politics, that the word personal means "private, individual". If you are going to thrust religion into the political spotlight and in a democratic-republic try to declare one of them as "the truth" then Obama is right to ask which one are we going to pick? In truth, if we are going to go with denominational lines, we should embrace some type of Catholicism as that is where the plurality resides. Going protestant causes a lot of headaches, for though non-Catholic Christians are the majority, Episcopal beliefs differ somewhat from Southern Baptist, UCC is in places radically different from Presbyterian. So who do you hold up the as "the standard"? And then there is the messy issue of the existence of agnostics and atheists. I had this discussion with a fellow conservative at work today when I declared I didn't want to know all of the details of a person's personal faith. I kinda like my Christianity minimal but deep and strong, not shallow and public (kinda like prayer, I prefer to pray in my closet rather than on the street corner wearing bells and covered with ashes). And as for Dobson taking Obama to task over his mixing Old Testament with New Testament, while I agree with him as a good Dispensationaist he should know there is a small sect within Christianity that wants us to go back to Old Testament laws even though we are "no longer under Law but Grace" (I would hope that if he considers himself as a spokesman for Christianity Dr. Dobson has heard of these Theonomists, a scary lot).

Now where do I think Obama went off track? Let me put your gray cells to work. Consider this:

Democracy demands that the religiously motivated translate their concerns into universal, rather than religion-specific, values. It requires that their proposals be subject to argument, and amenable to reason. I may be opposed to abortion for religious reasons, but if I seek to pass a law banning the practice, I cannot simply point to the teachings of my church or evoke God's will. I have to explain why abortion violates some principle that is accessible to people of all faiths, including those with no faith at all.

First off, it sounds good, but Senator Obama seems to ignore the fact that most conservatives who engage in public debate do try to "translate their concerns into universal... values... amenable to reason". The problem is he disagrees (or seems to) with many of the stronger philosophical arguments against abortion on demand (among other things, but most arguments against abortion do not introduce god into the discussion). Most liberals do this and think they are the rational ones when what they often do is take a knee-jerk reaction to anything that could have some tie back to religion (and seem to turn secularism into its own type of "religion"). In the following example he does it again. Notice how nothing is said of the individual as a possible causative agent in the situation, instead they are always at the whim of external forces around them:

After all, the problems of poverty and racism, the uninsured and the unemployed, are not simply technical problems in search of the perfect ten point plan. They are rooted in both societal indifference and individual callousness - in the imperfections of man

Why are the problems of the uninsured and the unemployed rooted in societal indifference? I hate when people talk about slippery slopes but honestly here I think we are one one... if the roots are societal then what are our options? What must change to kill this weed in the human garden? Like almost everything in his campaign, Senator Obama doesn't tell us, doesn't seem to want to do more than point fingers and if I take this last quote of his along with other things he has said what I see is that he thinks a Socialist/Marxist society would be of the greatest benefit. In this Obama seems to have missed some portions of Scripture too... about the worker deserving his wages (in context of getting what he is given for his work) and the example (and rule) given in 2 Thessalonians 3:9-11 ("... If a man will not work he shall not eat"). No one is owed anything in this life. At some point we have to take some responsibility for what we do. Perhaps the Right take this too far, but if he was honest in his speech Senator Obama should have admitted that the Left tend to veer off track in the own direction just the same.

Surprised?

2008-06-09T20:57:00.000-07:00

In working on a project in my Leadership and Creativity class for my MBA I took a test to see if I was left brain (logical and analytical) or right brain (artistic and creative). The results:

You are a right brain dominant student!

You probably get bored during long lectures and prefer to take classes with a lot of freedom of movement and thought. You like to write stories and even tell stories about your funny experiences. You might be a little suspicious of other people's motives sometimes, but that's only because you can usually tell whenever someone is lying or when they're up to no good. You are a little on the dreamy side--or a lot. You plan books or movie plots but you don't always follow through on things you think about. You should work on that. You are fun and spontaneous. Your feelings run deep, and it shows. You have strong instincts, and you solve problems on hunches and feelings. You are artistic in some way. You can believe in things based on experience, without seeing scientific proof. You might be a finalist on Survivor some day, since you know how to read people so well, and you have great survival instincts.

A Gem In Temecula

2008-06-09T19:41:00.000-07:00

Mr. Beau has been showing an interest in wines so last Saturday we took a little trip up the 15 to Temecula. In earlier posts you read of my trip with Elbert and some of the places we visited. On this trip I thought I would do two things: introduce Mr. Beau to more wines and find perhaps another place where I could get local wines that I would not be afraid of offering to my friends. As luck would have it I hit the jackpot on both with our first stop, Leonesse Cellars. In fact, I liked it so much I joined their wine club. After a couple of samplings together (a good representative Pinot Grigio, stainless-steel fermented so you get the melon and light green apple notes and their not overly oaked Chardonnay showing some traits of malolactic fermentation) I turned Mr. Beau loose on the whites (his palate tended towards the sweeter white Merlot and their rather good Riesling with very nice fresh fruit aromas) while I went off into red land. Their Melange de Reves is a nice medium bodied Rhone blend of Syrah, Cinsault, and Grenache with good berry tastes and just a hint of smokiness. Their 2004 Syrah is a good representation of a smooth Syrah, almost seductive with layers of black fruit, pepper, and a hit of smokiness. A big surprise was their Zinfandel which, given the current trend of overly alcoholed concotions was very smooth with good blackberry, pepper, and hints of clove with soft tannins. To top it off we had a fantastic lunch at their recently opened Block 5 restaurant. I really do recommend spending the extra time there sipping wine in the outdoor environment and enjoying their wonderfully prepared food.

So, Temecula is showing promise. I look forward to seeing how the area develops over time.

Harvey Corman R. I. P.

2008-05-30T10:43:00.000-07:00

The passing of a great comedian always make the world seem a little less bright, a little more dull.
I was fortunate to see Harvey Corman and Tim Conway at Harrah's Rincon. It was such a pleasant evening to see funny, clean comedy for a change.

You know, I always had my suspicions about Methodists. Thanks Harvey.

More Than Just Numbers

2008-05-26T09:37:00.000-07:00

646,392

320,518

1,076,245

103,284

211,454

2,442

44,308

What are these numbers? They represent the number of U. S. soldiers wounded or killed in

War Between The States (Civil War)

World War 1

World War 2

Korean War

Vietnam

Afghanistan (as of 31-Dec-2007)

Iraq (as of 31-Dec-2007)

How strange and how disheartening to me that the majority of people in this country will honor these men and women (and many others) by getting drunk and watching television. At 3:00pm I would hope that there is at least a slight pause in your activities to remember those who gave their all so that you have retained your right to do whatever it is you are doing today. These and many others took the following oath and lived those responsibilities:

"I, _____, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God."

Those of us who remain should remember what it means to affirm, to commit, to "swear" an oath. In today's world it is far too easy to be morally "squishy", to be non-commital, to not choose a side, to wait and see if something better comes along, to save our own hides at the expense of others. These men and women didn't, and we are a better country for it. I am reminded of what President Reagan said at the 40th anniversary of D-Day:

" Today the living here assembled -- officials, veterans, citizens -- are a tribute to what was achieved here 40 years ago. This land is secure. We are free. These things are worth fighting and dying for."

The Last Of My Vices

2008-05-25T20:01:00.001-07:00

And given what current research is turning out, soon the wine will not count. Good.

Beginning Of The End For Don't Ask, Don't Tell?

2008-05-23T09:52:00.000-07:00

OK, it's time to grow up and get rid of that incredibly stupid Clinton legacy of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (DADT). Just how many ways could Bill Clinton say "smoked but.. didn't inhale"? That is what DADT reminds me of... you can be gay, but you can't tell anyone or "act like it" (whatever that means). How so very Catholic of him. But now we may have a glimmer of hope. This week the 9th Circuit became the first court to review the military policy of DADT since the landmark case of Lawrence v Texas. Under Lawrence, the 9th Circuit said Wednesday, "Don't Ask" must be subjected to something more stringent than the rational basis test. The upshot is that the 9th Circuit's ruling makes it far more difficult to discharge someone simply because of their sexual orientation. They now have to make a specific case for discharging that person under consideration and that no other options are possible for that particular person. If it stands, this means being gay is not enough to disqualify you from active military service. You can read the entire ruling here.

Dinner Conversation

2008-05-19T11:40:00.000-07:00

Saturday night I had the pleasure of spending time with Mr. Beau and friends, eating and drinking the evening away. At one point the mass of cells located in my cranium aligned to make me think strange thoughts (well, not so strange for me but it would be strange for many people) about how given the different genders, sexual orientations, ages and backgrounds that it would be a good time to talk about something "deep" (after all, Smurfs seemed to dominate the first part of the dinner). Given the situation I launched into Plato's Symposium. Given that the title itself comes from the Greek and roughly meaning a "drinking party", I introduced the same topic discussed in that work, namely, what is love? I took a little different tact and asked the more concrete question "What do you look for in someone to form a relationship?". While not allowing for such responses as Aristophanes' regarding the feeling of wholeness one finds in that special person they love (one of my favorite pieces in Plato's writings), I admitted that I look for a "Dr. Phil" guy. What I meant was someone who observed many of the "life rules" set forth in one his earlier books Life Strategies. In short the idea is that you have to be realistic in that the world is the way it is. It's not fair, it's not nice, and you have to have your eyes open. You have to take responsibilities for your actions. Each of us create our own experiences. You have to be honest to yourself before you can be honest with anyone else. In short, someone who is real, grounded, honest. I don't want someone who is the way they are because they think that is what I want but they are the way they are simply because that is the way they are. In a relationship I want someone who understands that how they treat me creates their own experience of the relationship. If you ignore me, you can't sit around asking why I don't contact you, you need to start with yourself. If you don't make time for me in your life because you want me in it, then don't be surprised if I don't make time in my life for you. Get the picture? Outside of autoeroticism or narcissism, love and relationships involve more than one person. I think that starting with these traits as the foundation, traits of moral strength and looking at the world in a realistic way, you can be more assured that the person you are with is the person they say they are and that their feelings for you are real, honest, and open. I was lucky, because sitting at the other end of the table was someone who has almost all of these traits and he wants to be with me.

Not as eloquent as Plato, but I think I am more fortunate.

What We Miss By Not Looking

2008-05-18T18:59:00.000-07:00

Mr Beau took me on a date today to see the second installment of the Chronicles of Narnia, Prince Caspian. Like the first movie, this one touched me. Call me silly and sentimental, but simple statements of faith and truth can move me to tears. One of the most poignant exchanges comes between Lucy, the youngest child, and Peter who is the oldest:

Peter: Why didn't I see Aslan?
Lucy: Perhaps you weren't looking for him.

Immediately thoughts go to Jeremiah 29:12 - 14 where we find the promise given to Israel "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity."

If you seek, you will find. How often we miss this simple truth in our daily lives. We walk around with blinders on, often missing the big picture of life happening around us. How many relationships are ruined, opportunities lost, hours drained from our lives just because we do not open our eyes and look around us? How much do we miss by not living in the moment, observing our own behaviors and the reactions of those closest to us? As Doctor Phil says, we create our own experiences. The choices we make each day have consequences, but how often do we go about our lives asking how things could be like they are rather than asking how they could be any other way? How much do we miss because we don't look? Whether it is of eternal value (missing God because we don't look for Him in our daily lives) or temporal (the chance for happiness or to cut off actions that could lead to sadness and trouble), our lives are lessened when we fail to look.

Dang, My Character Died

2008-05-16T13:13:00.000-07:00

Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Albus Dumbledore

Strong and powerful you admirably defend your world and your charges against those who would seek to harm them. However sometimes you can fail to do what you must because you care too much to cause suffering.

Albus Dumbledore

90%

Hermione Granger

80%

Remus Lupin

75%

Sirius Black

65%

Ron Weasley

65%

Ginny Weasley

65%

Severus Snape

65%

Harry Potter

60%

Draco Malfoy

55%

Lord Voldemort

25%

My Oh My

2008-05-15T11:26:00.000-07:00

And in other "pink" news we have the disgraced former New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevy. I love this bit in the article:

"Now an Episcopal seminary student, McGreevey, 50, said he owes a prior divorce lawyer at least $116,000 and has not paid his first ex-wife any child support this year. He said he relies on his boyfriend to pay legal bills and other expenses.

McGreevey said he is indifferent to money and passed up opportunities to increase his income during his marriage by instead running for public office."

Indifferent to money? Typical Democrat... I'm indifferent to money so I will take all of yours to spend. OK, cheap shot (but true LOL). I suppose if I didn't pay my own bills and didn't pay child support to my first ex-wife I would be indifferent to money as well.

I wonder how his "boyfriend" is taking this? Perhaps I should have a talk with him given my own background in such relationships, but you would think being a financial adviser he would know about the "investment" in McGreevey...